April 7, 2009

Fireproof Your Marriage

FMIL had told Future Mr. and I about the movie Fireproof and urged us to watch it months ago. I have been begging and he finally caved last night. It's about a young couple on the verge of divorce and their fight to save their marriage. I knew it would be a feel good movie but I did not realize the impact it was going to have.
As a former atheist (for lack of a better word), slowly accepting God back into her life, I was not sold on the religious foundation of the movie. Boy was I mistaken, this is one of the most moving movies I have ever seen. While the acting was less than stellar, the message of the movie was loud and clear, and hit home for these soon to be newlyweds.
Today marriage is not the sacred union it once was. All too often people marry and divorce for the wrong reasons, many give up without even trying (I mean REALLY trying). With our parents still married, I was not raised that way and neither was Future Mr. My dad has always said divorce is not an option and that there is nothing you can't work out TOGETHER. That was the point of the movie.
Future Mr and I have been going through our "rough patch" (which couple doesn't, especially one planning a wedding) and this movie couldn't have come into our lives at a more perfect time. At the beginning of the movie you see both sides of the story, and naturally I take the wife's side (I could relate to her more than I have ever related to a nonfictional character).
Catherine feels as though "other things" have become more important to her husband, Caleb. She feels she is no longer important and the everyday arguments over housework, finances and jobs have become overwhelming and exhausting for her. Caleb, on the other hand, is a firefighter who lives by his own rules by day but feels disrespected and unappreciated at home. On the verge of divorce, Caleb's father challenges him to a "40 Day Love Dare". For the next 40 days he is given a love challenge that will help him understand and practice unconditional love. The movie goes deeper into faith, "How am I supposed to show love to somebody who constantly rejects me?" to which the answer is "this is the love Christ shows to us". In the end Caleb not only restores his faith in God but his marriage too.
This really made me look at the way I treat Future Mr and really opened my eyes. The first thing I did, after wiping away my tears, was hug and kiss Future Mr and tell him I was sorry and that I wanted to be better for him, for us. I learned that it's not always going to be easy and I'm not always going to get my way. I know that the way I talk to him isn't always tactful and I tend to blow things out of proportion. I also know not to sweat the small stuff. Life is too short to worry about trivial things and I need to understand that. We both agreed that we want to work harder at our relationship. We are putting our RELATIONSHIP first.
There is nothing greater in life than the relationship between husband and wife.


  1. Isn't that movie great. I recommend it for all couples no matter what stage of relationship you are in. In todays world people don't look at marriage as a covenant. It helped my marriage that is for sure. We also got the book, which is great, however we haven't completed it. The movie really makes you step back and realize that it's not just the other person that has to fix things. Even if they aren't ready it doesn't mean you can't do your part. I love it. SO glad you guys watched it.

  2. I agree! It's so easy to just get caught up in everything and not really see each other. I called FMIL the next morning and thanked her for recommending it to us.

  3. I'm doing the love dare (Josh doesn't know) and I totally see a difference.

  4. awe that's great!!! you'll have to let me know how it works for you!