Life After I "Dew"

The other day I talked about my 10 things I love about Kendall and so it's only fair that I share the things I love about my second born today.

Even though I have raised them exactly the same and they are siblings, my kids couldn't be more opposite.  Where she is a total rule-follower, he is pushing the limits.  When she is more shy, he is more outgoing.  About the only thing my kids have in common is their green eyes.  So I'm excited to share the things I love about James today.

He is 3.5 {will be 4 in August} currently.  He will be entering his first year of preschool this fall and I couldn't be more excited; trust me when I say, he's ready.  He is the definition of a boy.  He's loud, tough, messy, silly, dangerous and full of energy.  He's also the sweetest boy and my snuggler.  He's starting to lose his babyness but he still has his big pillow cheeks that I kiss way too much.

The things I love about that boy are as follows:

1. He is always randomly coming up to me and giving me love.  He will kiss me out of nowhere and hug my neck so tight I can't breathe.  He's the one that will come snuggle on the couch and lay with me in bed while he's waking up in the morning.  Such a sweet little guy.
2. He's a little comedian.  I could write a book of the funny things this kid says and I have no idea where he gets it from.  He always makes us laugh and say, "how does he come up with these things?!".
3. Right now he talks with a little lisp and I know we will want to correct it as he gets older but right now I think it's so cute!
4. I love his imagination.  Kendall's never been a big imaginative play kind of kid so this is new to me.  James will take his little Lego guys and build them houses and pretend they are ninjas or Power Rangers.  I love watching him be creative.
5. James has this little, super blonde patch on the back of his head.  His hair is starting to turn a little auburn as he gets older but there is one spot in the back that stays SUPER blonde.  I don't know if it's a birthmark or what but I hope it never goes away.
6. He has no problem making friends.  He will walk up and start playing with kids twice his age and most of the time they are totally OK with it.  He can hang with them and while it makes me extremely nervous I also love that he has that confidence.
7. I love his facial expressions.  When he's excited about something he bites his bottom lip and his eyes get really big.  He has a face for every emotion and will do them all on demand, anytime you ask.
8. He LOVES his sissy.  He wants her to be included in all the things he does.  When school was still in session, multiple times a week he'd ask to go pick her up early because he missed her.  He still fights with her like crazy but at the end of the day it's nothing but love between those two.
9. There's nothing he's afraid of.  He will climb the highest point at the playground, go down the biggest slides, jump from anything {including a houseboat last summer...}.  It scares me half to death but I gotta love that no fear attitude.
10. I love that he still seems like my baby.  He may be almost four but he is still squishy and has those sweet baby cheeks.  He's starting to look more like a boy every day but he still has lots of babyness left in him.  I'll soak it up as long as I can.

It's been a while since I've written any updates on my kiddos. It's been a while since I've written much of anything but we are in such an awesome phase of life right now.   Both kids are more independent as each day passes.  They've finally gotten to the ages where they will actually play together {something I never thought would happen}.  They love each other something fierce and I love watching their relationship.  With that being said I want to share some things I love about each one of them at this age {mainly so I never forget}.

Today we're starting with Kendall.  She is almost 7 {August} and is finishing up 1st grade.  She plays soccer in the fall and does Girl Scouts as her extracurricular activities.  She loves all animals and wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up.  She's the perfect combination of a girly girl and a tomboy.  She would prefer playing outside to playing dress-up.  She loves math and reading {chapter books especially}.  Her favorite color is green, favorite movie is Moana or the new Beauty and the Beast, favorite song is How Far It Goes {from Moana- any version}, favorite food is pizza and if you ask her who her best friend is she'll name of no less than ten people.  She's shaping up to be such a fun, cool, smart little girl and I'm going to try to narrow it down to just 10 reasons why I love her.

1.  Her personality is the type that everyone wants to be around.  Her teachers love her and since she was in preschool they have raved about how well-behaved she is.  When I drop her off at school I see kids running up and hugging her.  Even though she's a bit shy and reserved she's always getting invited to play/be included.  She's just got that infectious positivity that you are drawn to.

2.  She always gives 110%.  There have been many times where she's given a task to do and even though it's completed she keeps going.  Her teacher told me a story of them doing a writing assignment and Kendall had done what was required of her and even when all of the other kids were done she kept writing, putting in her finishing touches.  She is always striving to be better and give it her all {she gets it from her daddy}.

3.  She has a kind heart.  She's always thinking about others.  Like last week we were at a Girl Scouts meeting and she made James one of their treats to bring home for him.  She knew he'd like it and didn't want him feeling left out.  She does that kind of stuff all the time and it makes me feel like I'm doing something right with her.

4.  She's a good artist and loves to create.  I prayed that our kids would get Jimmy's artistic abilities and it looks like she has. She loves to color, draw, write, paint, you name it.  Crafting is her love language and its so fun to watch her imagination when she's making something.  I could dedicate an
entire room in our house just to display her artwork.

5.  Girlfriend has amazing hair!  I have been jealous of her perfect beachy waves for years now.  I constantly tell her that people pay good money to have a head of hair like hers.  She loves it too and hates to get even a trim and, for the most part, likes to wear it down.

6.  I love and admire how brave she is.  She isn't afraid of the things most kids are.  She went zip-lining when she was five with no hesitation.  She doesn't get grossed out by bugs.  She isn't afraid to play in the dirt/mud/sand and get dirty.  She is pretty much always up for anything and I hope she always stays that way.

7.  I could listen to her tell stories all day.  She is so animated and her facial expressions are simply the best.  When she tells a story, especially a more exciting one, she tells it with every ounce of her being.

8.  She is such a good listener, almost too much of a good listener at times ;-). When I tell her she can/can't do something until ______ she does just that.  She can remember conversations we had weeks, even months, ago because she's truly paying attention and listening.

9.  I love her green eyes.  She got them from my mom and my grandma and I love that she managed to get that over my brown or Jimmy's blue eyes.  Green is her favorite color so she absolutely loves having green eyes.  They totally change depending on the day or what she's wearing but there's no doubt that they're staying green.

10.  I love watching her think.  She will sometimes bite her bottom lip and other times she will have her eyes completely rolled back in her head.  Watching her brain work is one of my favorite things to observe.

As most moms could, I could go on for days about the reasons I love her but I'll narrow it down to these ten.  She caught a glimpse of me writing this and I saw her smile as she read the words on the screen.  I hope that one day when she's older she can come back to this and reread it and know just how much I love her.

I'm nosy and that's probably why I love blogging so much. You get a glimpse into people's lives, their likes, their struggles, and you can relate. You no longer feel like a weird-o or a bad mom because someone out there is like you {in some ways}.  I love to see what other goodies people are into these days so I thought I'd share some things I'm loving right now.

1. Green Mountain Coffee-Pumpkin Spice K Cups.  I'm addicted- I drink 2-3 per day currently.  Since it's National Coffee Day so I don't feel too bad about it...today.  I don't like PSL, no I don't, but these babies are just the right amount of fall festiveness to make me happy.  And now I'm gonna go make another cup. Don't judge me.
2. American Horror Story: Roanoke.  Guys last season of AHS was a total shit show.  Am I right?  We had to turn it off, pray to Jesus and never look back 45 minutes into the first episode.  What the hell was that?!  This season is right up my alley though, back to it's "roots".  I grew up watching scary movies so it takes a good one to give me the spooks and this does it.  I have so many questions each week and I kinda hate that I have to watch it live because I totally want to binge watch.  It's a little bit Blair Witch Project, a little bit AHS season one and I love it.  Are you watching?
3. 3 Week Yoga Retreat.  Since about this time last year I've been practicing yoga pretty regularly.  I've done the 30 Days of Yoga and Yoga Camp from Yoga with Adriene and loved both.  Whenever I'm feeling like I need it I go to her YouTube channel and pull up any one of her practices and dive right in.  I was SO EXCITED when Beachbody announced that they were coming out with a yoga program this summer.  Once I read the details I was a little nervous though.  It seemed like it might be too new school and so I judge it before I even gave it a try.  You know that saying, "never judge a book by it's cover"?  Couldn't be more true of me and the 3 Week Yoga Retreat.  I officially started it last week and I am loving it!  It's so good for beginners but also good for the more experienced too because it's good to try new things.  I still find it challenging some days but in a good way.  My body is responding and I am so excited for the next two weeks.  
4. American Eagle Hi-Rise Jeggings.  I'm fairly certain I've talked about these before but, with the cooler temps approaching, they are worth re-mentioning.  I was super skeptical of jeggings when I first learned about these {pajama jeans anyone?} but I tried them anyway.  Dream come true.  They're soft, they're stretchy, they don't gap in the back {girls with a booty will appreciate this}, they go with everything.  I have three pair and they're the only pants I wear in the fall/winter {besides yoga pants}.
5. Yeti Rambler Tumbler.  I know, I know, everyone and their mom has one these days and they all have cute monogrammed stickers to boot.  Well that's because they're awesome!  I use it every single day.  You want to keep you coffee hot?  This baby will keep it hot for AT LEAST two hours, I kid you not.  I fill it up with ice water at night, before bed and their is still solid ice when I wake up in the morning.  Everyone needs one, I promise it's worth it.

Since it's been pretty quiet around here lately and I kinda, sorta want to change that, I thought it'd be fitting to update you with my current obsessions.

Currently I am...

• Watching- Big Brother.  I'm obsessed.  It's my guilty summer pleasure that I look forward to every year.  This year has been pretty uneventful if you ask me.  Vanessa is clearly running the show and will probably end up winning if someone doesn't make a big move and get her out.  Maybe at double eviction this week?  Meg is my favorite, isn't she adorable!?
• Changing- my hair.  I went SUPER blonde this summer for the first time and I loved it!  It's been so fun and looks great with a tan. BUT fall is upon us and I'm thinking the same bright blonde might not look so hot against pasty, white skin.  Is ombre still "in style"?
• Dreaming- about a weekend away with my husband.  Our six year anniversary is coming up in October and I'd love to surprise him with a little weekend getaway.  
• Listening to- Twenty One Pilots- Blurryface.  These guys are local to us and friends of my BIL and just played on the VMA's for the second time last night.  Crazy excited for them!  Any time we're in the car we have them on Spotify. 
• Missing- our camper.  We started out the summer strong, camping three weekends in less than a month, but sadly haven't been out since July.  I'm thinking we need at least one more camping weekend this year and I think fall might actually be lovely.
• Praying- for my sweet girl as she transitions into kindergarten.  Friday was her first day and it was a little bit hard on her.  She was very tired and very emotional when she came home and spent most of Friday evening crying.  Praying today {her half day} will be easier on her.
• Reading- Dark Places by Gillian Flynn.  I read Gone Girl years ago and while the ending didn't surprise me, like most, I loved it.  I liked her style of writing and I liked how you didn't know what was going to happen next.  Dark Places is the same dark, mysterious, keep you guessing kind of book.  I'm super into it.
• Shopping- for fall clothes.  What are some must-have styles this fall?  I usually end up spending all of fall/winter in hoodies so I don't know why I even bother but I like to have a few cute things going into the new seasons.
• Planning- my next tattoo.  Most of my tattoos are pretty hidden or can be if necessary and this time I'm thinking I want something bolder, more visible...
• Catching up- on all the VMA drama.  I used to watch that award show religiously and after seeing some headlines I'm glad that is something I USED to do.  My God, what is this world coming to?
• Cooking- not much.  I'm honestly in a rut with cooking.  Seems like the same ole, same ole every week and meh. I'm thinking about signing up for eMeals again to get me excited about cooking again.  Although with fall right around the corner maybe soups and chili will get me inspired.  Any good recipes to share?

You guys know I love to share good products, finds, recipes, clothes, etc when I find them.  The reason I do this is because I know that I've discovered so many great things from other blogs and I hope that you find something that you love when I post my loves.

AVEDA Blue Malva Color Shampoo
This stuff is a blonde girls dream come true.  I know I'm not blonde blonde but I'm more blonde than I am brunette {or so I like to think} and this stuff helps me go months between highlights.  It takes away the brassiness that we blondes sometimes get.  I feel like it also lightens my roots making them far less noticeable which is why I can go nearly 6 months between highlights.  It also smells great and, like all AVEDA products, is plant based.  I use the conditioner too, according to my stylist the conditioner is what really sets it in.  It's a bit pricey but it lasts a while, like almost a year for me.

Brady Bands
A while back I had been seeing lots and lots of blog friends sporting these super cute headbands while they were working out.  I asked around, trying to find out about these miracle headbands and everyone kept recommending Brady Bands. I ordered myself four of them and impatiently waited for them to arrive.  When they came I loved all the adorable fabrics that they come in but were they truly "non-slip"?  I can tell you 100%, YES!  I have wore these to hot yoga, boxing, heck I have even slept in them and they do not budge, not even an inch.  These are legit and 10% of each purchase goes toward finding a cure for childhood cancer.  Go getcha some now!

White Collar
Jimmy and I have such a hard time finding movies and shows that we can agree on.  I've talked about my hatred for movie night more times than I care to count.  We started watching White Collar on Netflix a couple weeks ago and we love it.  It's the perfect combination of action {for him} and Hottie McHot Pants {Matt Boomer} for me.  We're only on season two and so far we are highly entertained.  I'm surprised I haven't heard more people talk about this show before. I know Matt Boomer was a candidate for Christian Grey in the Fifty Shades movie and I'm a little bummed that he wasn't chosen because, in my book, he'd be perfect for the role.

LARABAR Uber, Roasted Nut Roll
I am always looking for great, low calorie, clean breakfast and snack items. I get sick of just eggs or Greek yogurt or a smoothie and a lot of times I don't have time to make/cook myself something.  I am a typical American and saw these advertised on last weeks episode of Biggest Loser {and I had a coupon} so I decided to try these.  They are DELICIOUS.  They're gluten-free, vegan, only contain 9 REAL ingredients and are just 220 calories.  I've had the macaroon flavor too but the roasted nut roll is my favorite, so far.  I can't wait to try more.

Haba Toys
We got this, our first Haba toy, in our Citrus Lane box back in November.  I had never heard of Haba before but I liked the look of it and it fit perfectly in James's chubby little hands.  I looked up Haba and loved all their stuff and since have bought more teethers and rattles.  Jimmy loves them because they are all made of wood and they use water based stains to color them and are non-toxic.  We have the Toot-Toot Clutching Toy and the Haba Squeak-Squeak Clutching Toy and James loves them all.  I can't believe I didn't know about this brand of toys sooner, we'll definitely be buying more.

10 Minutes to Tone: Arm Workout 
So my arms have always been my problem area.  I hate them, always have, since 6th grade. They're cubby, don't fit in the sleeves of a lot of tops, look gross in cap sleeves, and are just plain annoying to me.  I found this 10 minute workout on Pinterest the other day and thought I'd give it a whirl.  I mean, even I can squeeze in a 10 minute workout.  So I did it and WOW!  My arms were on fire about halfway through but I was still able to finish it!  I loved that it was quick, the "teachers" aren't annoying, and she has trained Victoria's Secret models sooo....it has to work, right?  I used 8lb and 3lb weights, because that's what I have, they use 5lbs and 3lbs, so I like to think I kicked a little more ass then they did ;-).  A girl can dream.

What would Christmas be without a few of my favorite things?  Well, it'd still be Christmas, obviously, but I just love to share things that I love with you guys.  I always like reading posts where people share their Christmas lists/favorite products because 1. my Christmas list is lacking and 2. I've found a lot of great products this way.  So here are some things I love.

1. Old Navy Womens Vintage Raglan Crew Tees - Bright white

I ordered this before I had James because it looked like a nice, soft, comfy, great for my post-baby bod shirt.  Boy was I right!  I've ordered more since then and I live in them! Super soft and somewhat loose on the belly area but still fitted enough to not look sloppy.  Love it!

2.  Amaranth Collection Fleece Lined Leggings.

The other night I was holding James.  He was cooing at me, smiling with his whole face and bringing tears to my eyes, as he usually does at this level of cuteness. I am just in awe of this little man.  So in love.

If you've been a long time reader of this Hot Mess Express you know that after we had Kendall we were all "one and done" in the baby making department.  Not because of anything else other than the fact that we felt comfortable and complete as a family of three.  And then something hit me right around Kendall's 2nd birthday and I got The Fever.  We decided to have another baby.

The best decision I ever made.

Hold up, before you go getting all, "I can't believe she just said that!  What about Kendall?", let me explain.  When we got pregnant it wasn't really a decision, per se.  We were hot on the heels of our honeymoon and threw caution and birth control to the wind and BAM! we were pregnant.  We didn't give it much thought, just kinda said, "if it happens, it happens" and, well, 9 months later this beautiful girl made me a mama.
But James?  His conception was thought about and talked about and "timed" and was something we really knew we wanted to do before doing it.  If you know Jimmy and I we are very impulsive and don't usually give things too much thought which can sometimes be good, sometimes be bad.  So the fact that we talked and thought for months before was the longest we had ever contemplated anything.  And for good reason too, growing and raising a tiny human is no easy task and not one you do just because your fellow bloggers are doing it.

I posted a picture of us, as a family, on Instagram recently and one of the comments I got was, "I'm so glad you guys decided to have another baby." and it hit me, so am I.

He's just what this family needed.  I'm so thankful that we took the time to make our decision but at the same time, now that he's here, I'm wondering why we ever doubted adding another member to our family.  He makes us complete.  He makes us smile and he's made me see a whole, new side of Kendall that I never knew existed.  It's amazing.
He makes our family complete and our lives better.  I will forever love what adding him to our family has done for us, as a family.  He's the best decision I ever made.

• Halo Sleepsacks.  OK I know these things existed when I had Kendall but for whatever reason I didn't use them.  I am an idiot.  These wearable blankets are the greatest invention because babies+blankets=bad news.  I had a swaddle sleepsack when James was first born and he loved being wrapped up like a little baby burrito.  Something about feeling like they're back in the womb. Now he's a little bit {ok a lot a bit} bigger he's sleeping in the wearable blanket version that I got off Zulily before he was born {p.s. they have them on there right now for super cheap!}.  I love that I don't have to worry about him being cold or about him kicking blankets up over his head while he's sleeping.  Total comfort.

• Norah Jones Radio. Her voice is so soothing and when I went to Starbucks for 3 hours last week she's all I listened to. And I also like to put her on when I'm cooking breakfast in the dim light of the morning sun.  Her songs pretty much turn any moment into a movie worthy scene and I kinda love that.
• Coffee.  OK well this is nothing new BUT I have found a new way to enjoy it that's pretty clean!  If you know me or have read this blog for any length of time you know I am a coffee with cream kind of girl.  As in the more cream the better!  BUT with clean eating coffee creamer isn't really "allowed" and at first I kind of made it my exception but no more!  While we were in FL my ILs didn't have cream so I was forced to try it with almond milk and raw sugar.  I LOVED IT! So much that the first thing I did when we landed was hit up Kroger.  I had tried almond milk and granulated sugar before and hated it, the key is the raw sugar!  I don't even want to drink creamer now!  Nope not even the yummy holiday flavors!

• Parenthood.  And now I'm not talking about raising my little rug rats, I'm talking about the hit NBC show that has stolen my heart. I've watched since the beginning and I remember after the first episode I told Jimmy, "THIS is my new favorite show of all time" and it has been ever since.  I love love love that family and as much as I love my own, I might love the Braverman's a little bit more.  Kidding. Kind of.  The storyline with Crosby and Jasmine and the new baby?  Dead ringer for real life!  LOVING that whole thing.
• Old Navy for everything!  I swear my entire family looks like a walking commercial every day.  When I was pregnant they were my go-to place for maternity clothes, cheap and comfy!  After James was born I stocked up on some comfy basics and now that I'm feeling a bit adventurous I am venturing into their super cute graphic tees and sweaters.  We're having family pics soon {I swear} and all of our outfits have SOMETHING from Old Navy in them.  I just cannot get enough of that store.

• Timehop app.  I realize I'm super late to this app party. I was all, "I'm not giving in to another "thing"" and well look who's laughing now. This app makes me smile every day.  To see pictures from a year, two years, three years ago {to the day} is so fun!  I mean my sweet little baby KP!  I forgot she was ever so small and how much she and James really do look alike!  Download it now, thank me later.
• Taco salads.  Seriously cannot get enough taco salads these days.  I don't know what it is.  They're easy, clean, fast, full of flavor, and a total crowd pleaser.  I've been doing a bed of lettuce, {clean} taco meat, salsa, black beans, avocado, green peppers and onion. Eat your heart out, Chipotle.  I never thought I'd see the day where I'd eat a salad, taco or otherwise, without cheese but I don't even miss it.  Not even a little.

AND the one thing I'm not loving?  Starbucks red cups.  My Instagram feed has been full of them for a week now, a week!  The day after Halloween I went and was shocked that the Christmas cups were out.  I mean what about a cute orange and brown cup for Thanksgiving?  Respect the turkey people!  I love Christmas just as much as the next gal but red cups the day after Halloween is a bit much.  Am I right?

The other day my friend Cheryl {who is also pregnant with #2} asked me how I was holding up as my days with Kendall, as an only child, are numbered.  She admitted that when she thinks about her only son becoming a big brother it makes her emotional and she cries.  I don't.  I have yet to feel that feeling that everyone talks about.

Am I a bad mom?  Does it mean I don't love my child{ren}?  Am I emotionally unavailable?  Maybe I'm just cold-hearted?

I've been waiting for the day that I feel "it".  The "OMG we are having another baby and my baby won't be my baby anymore and OMG what are we doing!?" feeling.  I've heard my friends tell stories of rocking their first born with their giant, nine-month pregnant belly, and sobbing at the thought of what was about to happen.  I've read countless blog posts that document the final days of only child-ness and the overwhelming feeling of guilt, "will I be able to love another person as much as I love this one?".

Since the day I found out we were expecting Baby Dew #2 I have waited to feel this way.  I can even remember trying to force myself to have these emotions and then thinking, "nope still not there, still not crying" and wondering if maybe I just don't have it in me. Is that weird?

Don't get me wrong, I've had my share of meltdowns but it's usually over the fact that the house is a mess or because Jimmy went hunting {again}.

I think of James Weston joining our family and all I see is love, joy, happiness, our family will be complete.  I know that our love is going to grow and our family is going to be that much better with him in it.  I know that he will know nothing but love, especially from his big sister.  I think about our days and while I know they aren't going to be easy, by any means, I think they will be better.

I also don't really think about things that are too far in the future too much.  I think it's a gift, really.  I don't think about the fact that I'm going to be a mombie {mom-zombie} again because of the sleepless nights.  I don't think about the fact that my nipples are going to be on fire if breast-feeding goes well.  I don't think about the expensive diapers that it seems like we just got rid of.  I would much rather deal with those things when they come because they're inevitable and no amount of worrying about them will change that.  Ignorance is bliss, right?

I've come to realize, I'm not a bad mom and I'm not void of emotion I am just ready for our family to be complete and I know that James Weston is going to do just that upon arrival.  I look forward to the day that my babies will meet each other and Kendall will finally witness the moment we've been talking to her about for the past 9 months.  I think THAT will make me cry.

I've been doing a lot of soul searching, self-discovery, finding my place in this crazy world kind of stuff lately. You may have noticed that the posts around here have been a little more serious, less fluff and that's why.  I'm trying to find a happy medium but right now, right now this is where I am.

• I was going through my iPhone pics, trying to clear out all 702, and noticed something that seemed to make an appearance quite often.  My boots.  The best purchase I made for this fall.  I bought them for $40 at Target {of course} and they've been worth every penny.  I get so many compliments on them and when I tell people that they were just $40 they run to their nearest Target only to find they don't have them {in central Columbus anyway}.  They are comfy, go with everything, and for $40 you have nothing to lose.
• Also pretty much obsessed with Chai lattes.  I know I've talked about them before but it's true.  Grande, no water, soy Chai latte is my drink of choice these days.  I have had  Chai tea before and hate it, it's gross, I hate all tea though so that's no surprise.  Chai tea lattes though?  Amaze.  Soy milk only though, I had it with skim and it's just not as good!  Just trust me on this.
• I got two new head wraps for Christmas and I'm in love.  They are better than a hat in the sense that they don't mess up your hair as much and you can wear a pony tail with them with no problem.  I love the little flower details on both and fully intend on buying more.

• What about food?  I'd say the next most popular {Kendall will always take the #1 slot} category of photos on my phone is food.   I take so many pictures of food, just looking through my phone makes me hungry.  I like to say it's because I'm going to blog all of these delicious things we eat but the truth of the matter is I just tweet it and forget it.  What have we been having lately?
• This new blog design, I can't stop looking at it.  My pageviews are going to skyrocket and it's just because I keep looking at it myself.  I've said it before and I'll say it again, Katie did an amazing job.  She was responsible for the last one too {and it was great} but this one is just SO me.  The colors, the three little birds {Jimmy, Shannon & Kendall}, the new social media icons, I just love it!