What You Really Need In Your Hospital Bag {from a 2nd time mom}

You know, because I'm a second time mom I am Miss Know-It-All and that gives me some sort of authority to give unsolicited advice when it comes to all things pregnancy, parenting, babies, toddlers and whatnot. Kidding, kind of.

I have learned a thing or two in my almost three years into this mom gig. I learned that you really don't need 16 sets of receiving blankets.  You can make a birth plan but certainly don't expect things to go exactly as you have planned, it never goes that way.  When you bring that baby home and people offer to bring you food, help you clean your house, hold the baby so you can shower take them up on it.  This is the only time it is acceptable to sit on your ass while people cater to you.  And, you really don't need all that shit in your hospital bag, contrary to what the lists on Pinterest tell you.

As I approach The End {ha!} I am trying to get things ready, clean the house, have the clothes washed, and pack the dreaded hospital bag. Lots of other bloggers are on this same adventure right now so I'm feeling the pressure every time I open Instagram and see a freshly packed Vera Bradly Overnight Bag.  I didn't really stress over what to pack with Kendall yet here I am, a second time mom, wondering what on Earth I really need.  Then it dawned on me, the reason I'm not stressed about it is because I packed a normal amount the last time and never felt like I forgot or needed anything and so why do it different this time?

For the baby you don't need much. Trust me.  As far as clothes go, he/she is going to wear the hospital provided kimono top unless or until you take hospital pictures and/or go home.  Pack one, maybe two, outfits and be done with it.  Same goes with blankets, although this time I am taking one of my own but you definitely don't need more than two, tops.  Take some mittens and booties because I don't think the hospital provides those and take a cute hat because we all know how long and hard I searched for The Perfect Hospital Hat {I just like my babies to be original and have their own sense of style from day one}.  Maybe take a pacifier but again the hospital has those so don't stress if you forget one.  Newborns sleep a lot so when I see carseat toys on the lists I laugh, seriously?!  But don't forget the carseat, that's kind of necessary if you ever want to bust out of that joint.  But actually, the hospital provides those too so it's OK if you forget it too.  Oh and bottles, don't bother.  I brought some when I had Kendall and that was dumb.  She ate out of the ready-made bottles for a good 3 days, save yourself the trouble, you won't use them.

As for you, what would you normally pack for a two night stay?  That's basically what you'll need to pack this time.  Toiletries {shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hair ties, face wash, blow dryer, deodorant, toothbrush, etc}are a must, go ahead and take some makeup even.  As for clothes, I wore the hospital gown the entire first day {remember I was in the hospital for four days thanks to an unplanned c-section} and only changed out of it because of visitors.  I packed 2 gaucho pants, 2 sports bras, and 2 tee shirts and I wore a maxi dress home.  Fancy, I know.  Honestly I'll probably do the same thing this time because it was comfortable, didn't bother my incision, and I looked somewhat put together {more so than in gauchos and a sloppy tee}.  You don't really need pads {TMI but I know you were wondering} because they provide you with the ultimate overnight pads while you are there.

A few things that I find comical when I read these lists {besides the toys for the newborn} are your own delivery gown.  I mean, seriously, you are going to get Lord knows what on it, why waste money on bringing your own?  Snacks and drinks are a little bit ridiculous because you can't eat or drink so why bother?  Plus, again, the hospital will give you water so save yourself the room in your bag and don't pack bottled water.  Call me crazy but I think taking books, magazines, and/or DVDs is also unnecessary.  While you are in labor the last thing you are going to think is "Hey!  I really think I want to watch The Hangover Part II."  No, you are going to think "OMG is this going to end!?" and want to just be present with your husband in your final moments before your world gets turned upside down.  And after the baby?  Psh you are just going to want to stare at and hold that sweet little bundle, a movie, book or magazine will be the furthest thing from your mind.  But do take your laptop, iPad, phone, camera and chargers for all of the above.

Some things that I didn't bring last time and will probably bring this time are some slippers or those comfy, cozy stay-at-home socks, a pillow of my own and one for Jimmy, the boppy {because I plan to breastfeed this time}, and a big sister gift for Kendall {obviously}.  That's it.  I mean I'll take my ID and insurance cards, since those are on every list {seems like a no-brainer to me though}.

See it's really not that big of a deal, don't stress yourself out.  This coming from someone who planned on a two day stay, wound up with a four day stay and still didn't feel like I missed or forgot anything.  And if you do?  I'm sure the hospital has it or worse case scenario the gift shop does or there is a CVS near by.  Don't stress.

What You Don't See...

Have you ever looked at someones picture{s} on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Blogger, etc and thought "Wow! She has it all together!" or "OMG look how clean her house is!"? I know I have, one too many times.

 And then it happened, someone commented on this photo of Kendall I posted to Instagram a couple weeks ago.

{I had taken her through the drive-thru of Tim Horton's and let her sit in the front seat and eat TimBits in the parking lot}.

The comment said, "You are such a good, and fun mom!".  And it made me think about what that person did not see in that picture.

What you didn't see was the fight to get out the door that morning {and most mornings, if we're being honest}.  Pregnant Shannon really really wanted doughnuts and thought that a toddler would think that was just the bees knees.  Kendall had other plans that morning, none of which involved driving 15 minutes for some doughnut holes.  There was a lot of, "come oooooonnnnn, it'll be SO.MUCH.FUN.  You can even wear your nightgown AND crown AND moccasins!!!" going on behind the scenes. Sure, once we got there she was over the moon about it.  She loved sitting in the front seat and, of course, then she thought I was that good, fun mom.

It made me think about what's going on in the background or before/after a picture is taken that we, the viewer, can't see or hear.

Like this adorable mother/daughter selfie.

This was taken the night of Jimmy's 28th birthday party.  The house was clean, the bonfire was roaring, the weather was perfect, the food was prepared the night was going to be perfect for my husbands birthday.  However, 30 {or so} minutes after I snapped this I found myself in the bathroom, crying my eyes out because I just couldn't handle another toddler tantrum.  I had reached my limit that night and it was ugly.  So bad that my MIL offered to keep Kendall over night for the first time that night because she could see it in my eyes.  But you would have never guessed it from this pic, right?

Then there's the food pics, you know the ones.

That my friends is the rare "healthy" version of froyo I got one day.  Someone even commented that my version looked so much "healthier" than theirs.  Normally it's covered in Oreos, whipped topping, perhaps a cheesecake bite or two and a drizzle of chocolate syrup for good measure {I blame it on the fact that I normally share with a certain two-year-old too}.  This was a "good day" as far as the pregnancy sweet tooth is concerned and typically you'd be appalled at what I shove in my pie hole.  

And then there's my immaculate house {ha!}.

I wish.  My bedroom wasn't even "clean" for this photo op.  What you don't see in this picture is the pile of clothes that were behind me, the stack of pillows {remember I sleep with no less than 4 these days} in the corner, and the laundry in baskets that had been waiting to be put away for days.  The same goes for the rest of my house.  As I type this there is a tea party set and beach towel covering my coffee table, blankets strewn all over the couch and a pop up tent overflowing with stuffed animals to my right and I have no plans of picking any of it up, any time soon.  

What I'm getting at here is you just don't know so you shouldn't judge {whether it's good or bad} what you see in a persons photo feed.  You never know what struggle went into that "fun" moment they captured or what meltdown happened a mere 2 seconds after.  You see a spotless section of their house and assume that they are a better than you because holy crap your house looks like a tornado just came through.  But in reality that may be the only room, heck spot of their house, that is spotless.  You just never know.

Remember we share what we want to share.  We tend to share what's good, clean, fun in our lives because that's what people want to see, right?  I mean sure it's fun to see the occasional "keepin' it real" post where we divulge all of our flaws and messiness but that's not the image we want to portray for ourselves.  We don't want people to think that we live like, gasp, humans.  But why?

I think it's got something to do with that Keepin' Up With the Jones' mentality and now with Pinterest making us feel like we should be the next Martha Stewart it only makes the pressure that much greater.  I would love it if all of my house was Pin-worthy but we live in our house and therefore most of the time it's not suitable for viewing.  I would love to tell you that the "fun" moment you are seeing was just that but the truth is I live with a toddler and, let's face it, toddlers are bi-polar which makes life, in general, more "messy".  

So, the next time you look at someones pictures and think that she's obviously more fun, clean, creative, etc than you, just think about what you aren't seeing.  She's just like you, she struggles, she has messy moments, she is human too.

Snack Attack

Let me ask you two questions...

1. Have you ever been watching TV, saw a commercial for a snack, gone to the grocery store to buy said snack, come home to sit down and watch the latest episode of RHOWhatever and find out your savory snack sucks?

2. Are you someone who loves getting subscription boxes in the mail?

Read more here...

Your Offering

I'm not sure if this is a socially acceptable topic but it's one I'm curious about and so I'm putting it out there. Tell me if I'm out of line.

I am curious to know how you/your family handles the offering at church.  Do you give every week?  Once a month?  Do you ever feel intimidated when that basket comes around?  Do you give the equivalent of a days worth of pay?

Let me say this, when they get the offering baskets out and start passing them around I get nervous.  I don't know what's appropriate to give, I don't want other people seeing what we give, some weeks I forget to bring cash or check therefore have nothing to offer {thank God our church offers online giving}.  I know it shouldn't but it makes me anxious every single week.

I've heard some people say that they treat is as any other bill/payment and it's figured into their budget.  Those people pay one lump sum once a month.  But then there are others who give a little bit every week.  We usually wind up giving every week but I kind of think I like the idea of doing it once a month.  Does it matter?  I don't think so.

I am also a big fan of keeping it anonymous.  We usually give cash and don't put it in an envelope with our names on it or anything.  I think that it shouldn't matter WHO is giving WHAT, that's not the point, right?  Yet it seems most people are slipping in envelopes so maybe we are doing it wrong.

Then there are the weeks where we struggle to get out the door with our clothes on correctly and I leave my purse in the kitchen and Jimmy doesn't have any cash on him.  Those weeks we don't have anything to offer and, while I'm sure this isn't the case, but I feel like people are thinking "Oh you didn't give?!".

I clearly am thinking too much into this, I realize that.  But I'm curious what others do and think about the subject.

SO WHAT! Wednesday

This week I'm saying SO WHAT if...

• I let Kendall eat chips and salsa, a Handi-Snack and an apple for dinner last night.
• I got "dressed up" to go to the doctors yesterday.  To a SAHM leaving the house is huge so why not get dressed up?
• It may be cooler outside than inside our house but I still have the air on. 
• Kendall peed the bed the other night and rather than change sheets in the middle of the night I just put a towel down.
• I just got my PayPal MasterCard and it's like a door opened to endless online shopping possibilities.
• I ignore phone calls sometimes.  Just because I have my phone available doesn't mean I have to answer it.  Right?
• I totally fell for the Brady Bands trend and ordered myself 4 last week.  You guys were right!  Those things rock my socks AND really do stay put!
• I get really annoyed when I type up a response to a comment someone leaves me only to find out that they have a no-reply email address.  Burns my biscuits!
• Normally we keep our a/c on 75 during the day, these days?  Nothing above 70.  I'm going to hate our electric bill.
• I don't really need anymore Scentsy but I could not resist some of their new spring/summer scents and placed an order yesterday.
• I want to hire a landscaper to come and rip everything, yes everything, that is not a tree or bush out of our yard.  It's like a jungle out there.
• I also want to hire a house cleaner for these next few months.  I cannot keep up like I used to and I'm sure with a newborn it'll be even worse.
• I can't wait for preschool to start.  I think Kendall is going to thrive and love it, I'm excited for her.

The Second Time Around

Everyone says that pregnancy the second time around goes SO FAST. Those people are lying.  OK maybe not lying but those people are not me.  I'm not going to complain, ok maybe a little, because I've had a great pregnancy {both times} really but DUDES is it over yet?  I'm officially at that point, but hear me out.

This time I have a toddler, well almost preschooler, and that makes this time around a little bit tricky.  See, while I feel great I am getting to the point where I can't do the things I {and Kendall} want to do.  Jump at the bounce house?  I don't think that Baby Brother would like that.  Run around the playground?  I get out of breath going up and and down 3 steps.  Heck even carrying her a short distance is getting too much now.  And yes I realize she is old enough and most definitely capable of walking any/everywhere but sometimes it's just easier and faster to pick her up.  But those days are getting numbered, I'm just going to get used to thinks taking a little bit longer and moving a little bit slower.

I feel bad when she wants me to "spin wiff me mommy!" and I get dizzy after one twirl.  I hate that the things I used to be able to do, that I loved to do are now just impossible.  Makes my mommy heart sad.

I had promised myself to make this summer her best one yet since it's her last one as an only child and some days I feel like I'm failing at that.  I mean we have no shortness of fun most days but some days it's parenting from the couch for the win.  I know she won't even remember these days but I will and I want them to be happy memories.

Then there's the weight gain/big belly.  I swear it's because I'm so short {5'3" on a good day} that I show so soon and look bigger than whatever given week I'm in.  I was reminded of this on Saturday when we went to a wedding.  Total strangers were all "when are you due?" and I assume they were expecting me to say "tomorrow" because when I said "oh...August" I got wide eyes and gaping mouths, "oh honey, I'm sorry!  I was hoping there was relief in the near future." was just one of the responses I got.  Gee, thanks.  What not to say to a pregnant woman, rule number one!  Oh and the boob comments.  Like I don't realize they need their own zip code.  I am the one that just bought a 36G bra, I'm well aware that they are out of control, I do not need any reminders.

The past few weeks have brought on a little bit of discomfort.  My feet are achy now which actually happened a lot sooner with KP.  My right hip hurts almost constantly.  I had a maternity massage this weekend and the masseuse could tell that it was definitely my problem area and worked on it a bit longer than everything else.  I'm still not sure if that helped or made it worse.  But other than that, I'm pretty complaint free.  Honest.

I'm really trying to enjoy these pregnant moments because I'm almost 100% positive that this will be our last pregnancy and baby.  I love the baby kicks and rolls.  I love getting all the baby stuff out again.  I love the excitement that comes along with a new baby.  I am so thankful that I've felt amazing this whole time and have avoided morning sickness, swollen feet and pregnancy acne with both of my pregnancies.

The thing about this time around is there is a lot less "prep" work too.  I mean we already have things like the swing, pack n play, bassinet, etc and the nursery is set up, clothes are washed, his bag is packed so it's like we are just waiting around for a baby to show up!  A lot of my preparedness has to do with the fact that we aren't buying and moving into our first home 2 months before D-day either.  Oh and I'm a SAHM now too, so that helps.

I'm still not sure what to think about Kendall.  It could really go either way with her, she could be the best, most loving, helpful big sister ever or completely hate the idea.  I'm hoping for the first scenario, obviously, and doing my best to prepare her in hopes of her getting really excited when he's here.  My BFF just had a baby 2 weeks ago and we've been around her twice now and Kendall is interested and says things like "look at her tiny feet!!!"  but then she doesn't want to hold her or anything which is actually cool with me.  I'd love it if she were like that with her brother but only time will tell.

Oh another thing, wine is harder to abstain from this time around.  I blame The Toddler/Terrible Twos-Almost Threes.  That's all.

Who loves a good deal? Who loves getting things for free? Who likes making money doing {basically} nothing? I do! Today I wanted to share some of my favorite sites, shops, affiliates, etc and maybe help you reap some of the rewards I've benefited from lately.

Linqia:  I've posted about this new partnership on Facebook and Twitter a bit lately and that's because I've loved my success with it so far.  You get assigned campaigns, some of them require a blog post others just require social media shout outs, and based on your blog stats you are given a budget and that's basically what you are trying to earn during your campaign.  Don't meet your budget?  No problem, you still get your earnings no matter what they are.  My last campaign lasted 21 days and I made close to $200 for promoting a company I really support!  Some of their brands are Coca-Cola, Green Works, and One Kings Lane.  You also get referral credits of $5 per person accepted so that's a little bonus.  Interested in making a little blog money?  Sign up here.

Ebates:  I've told you about Ebates till I'm blue in the face so if you're not using it by now you are crazier than Amanda Bynes.  Do you shop online?  You should be shopping with Ebates.  You earn money buying things at hundreds of stores.  You are basically getting paid to shop!  At least that's how I justify it to Jimmy.  He loves the little bit of money I get back from my purchases so much that he uses it to buy things online too!  Plus you can search for coupon codes for the items you are looking for that are only available to Ebates subscribers.  Sign up now, thank me later.

Zulily:  Looking for a great baby gift?  Good deal on boutique kids clothes?  What about designer handbags?  Zulily has all of that, and more! I've gotten Halo sleep sacks for baby brother a fraction of the cost at Buy Buy Baby or Target for that matter.  I saw Gucci handbags a couple of weeks ago!  Say what?!  I know!  Toys, clothes, shoes, maternity, you name it!  A couple of months ago they even had TOMS for almost half price!  I got Kendall the cutest pink canvas pair, perfect for summer!  It's invite only so here's your invite.

thredUP:  Laura told me about thredUP a few months ago and I'm so glad she did.  I have gotten almost all of Kendall's summer wardrobe for free or next to nothing.  How?  Well you can clean out your own closet, they'll send you a mailing bag, stuff it full and mail it back.  They'll sort through it, price it and then give you the cash in the form of store credit!  It's THAT easy!  Everything I've gotten so far has been in EXCELLENT condition and I've barely spent anything out of pocket.  And if she happens to get cherry red popsicle on her new tank I don't get too stressed when I know that I didn't pay a small fortune for it.  Shop here and get $10 off your first order!

Baby Cheapskate: I love this site! Every week they post the top diaper/wipes/and formula deals for the week.  Basically what store has them the cheapest per item count every week.  And not only do they share this wealth of knowledge but also when stores are having amazing sales or a specific item drops in price {last week they posted Aden +Anais Dream Blankets that were on sale for $37 from $50!!!}.  I find it easiest to follow them on Facebook and they are constantly posting the latest and greatest deals.

Those are my favorites and go-tos right now.  If you guys like this sort of thing maybe I'll make it a monthly feature where I share my top 3 or 4 of the month.  Would you be into that?  Who doesn't love saving money?