Life After I "Dew"

Remember my last post about life with two? Scratch that, reverse it.

Today sucks.

Let me set the scene.

7:10 am- "MOMMY I'M AWAAAAAAKE!!!!"   Good Lord this is not the wake-up call I asked for but OK, my feet hit the floor and I was on my mom a-game from the get-go.  It is really my own fault because I should have gotten my lazy ass out of bed earlier, but I digress.

7:30 am- "Let's make muffins!"  OK sounds amazing!  Sounds like good mommy/big girl bonding while the baby naps.  Except, he won't nap.

8:00 am- Muffins are done, they're delicious, even Kendall agrees.

9:30 am- An hour and half later Kendall still hasn't eaten her ONE muffin yet she's whining, "I'm so huunnggrrryyyyyy".  So I turn off the TV, make her sit at the table, and take all her "toys" until she's finished.  Cue the meltdown. I decide I'm going to ignore it and take the baby into his room to rock him to sleep, except he doesn't want to sleep.  Oh and construction is happening outside of our house and the smell of black top is about to send a certain three-year-old into a downward spiral, suddenly she has a very sensitive sniffer.

10 am- Through tears, screams, whines, threats and bribes the muffin is finally gone. Hallelujah, life can go on.  Baby finally sleeps and I decide some big girl outside action is in store so we head to the back yard to play on the swing set.  Ten minutes into swinging, laughing, finally having a good time and I hear it, the baby is awake over the monitor.  Crap.

11 am- Baby takes a nice warm SIX OUNCE bottle and I assume he'll pass out but nope, he's wide-eyed and doesn't want me to put him down.  At all.  Ever.

11:30 am- The toddler is hungry.  Here we go again.  Except this time she sits at the table, eats all of her food, all is well.  The baby is asleep in the bouncer.  #winning.

12:30 pm- It's nap time.  Kendall hears the timer go off, alerting her that it's nap time and takes off running out the sliding glass door and heads down the deck stairs.  Are you kidding me!?  I chase after her, remind her that 1. we do not run when it's nap and 2. we do not go outside when no adults are out there.  Carrying her up the stairs starts a meltdown because "I want to waaaaaaaaaaaaalk" OK so I put her down to walk the rest of the way except suddenly she's a statue.  Frozen. Won't move.  Fine so I carry her in to the potty and then it starts.  Kicking, screaming, crying and that's when I said, "Enough!" and put her into her bed sans all of her My Little Pony friends.  That tantrum lasted about a half an hour too long and at which point the baby is now awake.

It's really my own fault.  Yesterday I bragged about how good James sleeps, he sleeps all.day.long.  And damn it, I should have gotten up at 5:30 am like James suggested when he woke up to eat.

If you need me I'll be day-drinking.  Judge away.

SAY WHAT?  I know.

Listen the last time I was pregnant it was easy giving up the sauce.  For starters I hadn't discovered the amazing-ness that is boxed wine.  Call me young and dumb. Secondly, I didn't have a two-year-old in the throes of potty-training.  Call me insane.

This time around I have really been craving a little droplet of the good stuff here and there. I know some people say it's OK to indulge in a half a glass or so every once in a while but I'm not that girl.  I'd hate to think that if Baby Dew #2 came out with a third nipple it was because mama was tossing back an occasional glass of Crisp White.

Ain't happening.

So...on New Years Eve my dear friend supplied all three, yes three, preggos with sparkling cider, Pregnant Champs if you will.  It was tasty, like really tasty, but all I could think was, "man, this would be GREAT mixed with the real deal".  You see it didn't even remotely taste like Martini & Rossi and, like Adam Levine in a tee shirt, it left me wanting more.

This weekend I was really craving a nice glass of vino. I blame potty-training.  I knew that there had to be another, more authentic tasting option that wasn't O'Doul's {bleh}.  Lo and behold the Kroger beer and wine department.  {FYI it was located with the mixers, club sodas, and seltzers}.

FRE Alcohol-Removed wine stared me right in the face.  I was hoping to have a wide variety but I guess when you are shopping for boozeless booze what you get is what you get.  FRE came in a few varieties, "Premium White", Chardonnay, Merlot, Red Blend, etc.  Sold.  I grabbed that bottle {too bad it doesn't come in a box- are you listening FRE people?!} so fast you'd think the shelf was on fire.

Of course I Instagrammed a picture of my latest find as soon as I had cell service again.  I received lots of comments, questions, and expert opinions.  Everything from "you must tell me about this" {hello fellow pregs!}, to "don't waste your calories" {I'm pregnant, what calories?}, to "my fav!" {woohoo!}.   Needless to say I couldn't wait to pour my own glass and form my own, expert, opinion.

My thoughts?  It does the trick, but not THE trick.  It's definitely more authentic tasting than the sparkling ciders and grape juices, so that's a big bonus.  It doesn't taste exactly like wine, but why would it?  It's grape-y, yes, but I don't feel like I'm drinking straight out of the Welch's jug either.  It tastes just like white wine, minus the alcohol.  Fair enough.  All in all it's a pregnant woman's dream come true, in my opinion.  I can't wait to try the other variations.

If you are pregnant, or a recovering alcoholic, I'd recommend a case of this stuff.  It's better than nothing and sometimes you just need to feel fancy and drink from something other than a plastic tumbler {and something other than water}.

*All opinions are mine. I was not compensated for this "review" {I'm sure the FRE people have never even heard of this blog} however I'd love it if the fine makers of FRE would contact me because I'd love a case a month for the next 7 months. Please and thank you.