October 25, 2011

PSA from L.A.I.D.

Alright people, here's the thing, as parents we want all sorts of things for our kids.  We want them to be happy.  We want them to have fun.  We want them to laugh.  But most importantly {for me anyway} we want them to be healthy.
Right?
Well if that is true then please DO NOT bring your sick kids to the park where my {healthy} child is playing.
Maybe you're thinking, "oh some fresh air will do him/her good".  And, you may be right but do it in your own back yard!  Don't have a back yard?  Take them on a walk.  Walks require no interaction with other kids.  Walks allow you to be outside but not touch things that my kid will touch.
Kendall and I were at the park {oh and my mom too} and we were happily playing, climbing, laughing, having a great time when this dad and his two obviously, visibly sick girls came and rained on our parade.  These little girls had eyes so red I would have thought they were...well I'd rather not say.  And their coughs?  Rivaled my 48 year old dad's morning hack session.
Party over.  We went home.
So my {healthy} child had to go home {where said sick children should have been} for no reason.
Oh and while we're at it.  If your toddler is a bully {I didn't even know those existed} and you go to a playground please do not leave him/her unsupervised. 
Case and point:  here we are at the indoor playground.  Kendall is minding her own, being adorable as always, and here comes toddler bully.  She had just gone down the slide and is just sitting at the bottom when he comes running over to give her what looks like a hug.  Aw sweet.  TACKLE!  He practically close-lined KP.  She was fine.  Dad took the boy and apologized, all is good. 
THEN Kendall is in the tunnel, trying to decide which slide to go down and here comes toddler bully.  He's going to "hug" her again, it looks like.  I stand watching.  Toddler bully's dad is nowhere to be found.  This time he is ON TOP of KP and will not let her up.  So I climbed my mommy butt in that tunnel, yes I did, and pulled my girl out to safety.  This time all was not well.  We had a full blown meltdown and had to leave.  Again WE left because of another kid's behavior. 
So here's my question{s}.  Am I just being a naive mommy?  Is this just how it goes on the playground?  Should I just be prepared for these types of things to happen and brush them off?  I hate to think this is the kind of world KP is growing up in but maybe that's just how it is nowadays?

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20 comments:

  1. sadly i would be lying if i were to tell ya that this was an isolated incident. granted there are plenty of other parents out there like us who would never bring our sick child out and/or allow them to bully anyone -- but there are just as many who would. even in our library reading group we have a bully and it's a little girl -- we refer to her as DESTRUCTOR & her idiot mom is Mute Mom. i rant about her frequently... heh.

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  2. I hate to say it, but I think this is the way of the land. Parents, most parents, don't get it. They are clueless and selfish fucks. Us good mommies are the rare ones these days.

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  3. It happens all the time! Now I would also be lying if I said H never pushed or bossed around other kids because he does and we are working on it. I do not leave him unattended though and always correct him or remove him from the situation. I have 1 mom friend who follows her son around and just keeps harping on certain things and the poor kid can never moved past something....I do not do this, I try to tell H the way he should act, if he doesn't I remove him and talk to him privately, if he still cannot behave we leave.

    Hope you have some better playground experiences soon :)

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  4. It sucks, but it is the world we live in. Parent's don't watch their children like they should. I mean mine isn't innocent by all means, but I'm on her like white on rice all day everyday!!! If it's like this now, what the hell is it going to be like in high school??? I'm going to need medicated.

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  5. I have to say this is just how it is for the most part. There are always sick kids at the park and play areas. ALWAYS. They are a breeding ground for nastiness. And the bullying thing too. Some parents are on top of it, some just let their offspring loose and don't do a thing to stop it. You really have to watch the little ones like your 'lil sweetie. I have a 2 year old who is a complete bully. Sorry to say, but it's true. I have to watch her like a hawk, especially around babies. If I see her getting too close I have to go stand by her to make sure she doesn't push or hit anybody. Sometimes she's a victim too, but I guess with 4 kids my skin's a little thicker. I try to be understanding & give the other parents the benefit of the doubt, but I will definitely interfere if the other kid's parent doesn't.

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  6. I agree. that's the way it is. Lots of parents use playgrounds as a free babysitter. And lots of "big kids" don't get that they have to be gentle with little ones. And without a parent to tell them, you get what happens. one time, I think L was like 2, he was playing on his bounce house with a huge slide. thus little f'er, who was Like 4 or 5, pushed L down the giant bounce house slide just as he was getting ready to go down on his own. I wanted to strangle that kid. L didn't care but I did. Turns out that kid was scared to go down the slide. not sure why he pushed my kid but whatever. his equally stupid mom (who never apologized but was standing right there) eventually had to climb up and bring him down.

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  7. Sigh. I think it just happens. EVERYWHERE. Especially in circumstances like that where a parent can let their kid loose and be "free" from parenting for a little while. I mean, we all need a break now and then - don't get me wrong. But some people don't realize that mommies and daddies don't get to be off the clock. I hate it when people don't correct their children...and I probably would not have been as nice as you were ;)

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  8. My 16 month old acts like the toddler bully you mentioned. He gets really excited around other kids, and that's how he shows it. First a hug, then...it just becomes something more. He hugs too long, or too tight, or something. But, we know this about him, and because of that, we always keep a very close eye on him. We try to work with him on it, but I will tell you that it is beyond embarrassing when it happens.

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  9. I hate to tell ya, but that's how it is now. It's the same with Chloe at Day Care. It's sad...but that's how toddlers are.

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  10. No that is pretty much the norm. Most parents take their kids to places like that so they don't have to watch them. It was obnoxious when I was a nanny and will be even mor obnoxious when I am a mom. Hopefully, I will be better about my public outbursts and swearing by then. Sorry KP got the short end of the stick. Poor girl.

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  11. People are so selfish. I can't imagine taking my sick child where other healthy kids are. It's just plain thoughtless.

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  12. Gosh I deal with this issue daily! I run a daycare and no joke I had just given a reminder to my parents about sick kids and if they are sick they NEED to stay home. No joke come Monday morning a child was brought with a cough that lasted all last week and by Friday I came down with a cold from this kid! I was furious!! That is the issue I deal with, parents nowadays do NOT think about anyone else or the affects on other people by their actions. It's awful! I wish I could say it's not normal but it seems like this is the way most parents are in this world.

    Sorry for your experience! I wish there was more parents like you seem to be and myself but I personally don't see any :-(

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  13. I think some kids get excited and don't mean to be a bully. They are either allowed to do those things at daycare/home and don't know they are doing wrong in other places where its not appropriate. (Even though in my opinion its not appropriate at all.) We had a biting incident at daycare where my daughter continued to be bit and the other little girl wouldn't quit. (Keep in mind she's 4) The parent saw no problem with it because "all kids bite, it was no big deal" but to me, its a huge deal! Especially when I sent my daughter to school with 1/2 her nose bit off. (not really but it looked bad!)

    Parents need to be parents! Accept responsibility and think about other kids that they are affecting. Do NOT take your sick kids to school or daycare because you don't want to miss work. I don't want to miss work either but I do. I don't want my kids having to sit through daycare miserable and I don't want to continue the process of everyone getting sick and passing it back and forth. Ugh, this post is what I feel and can't say a LOT! Thanks for sharing! and sorry for ranting! haha

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  14. Ohhhh I hate when Moms bring their snotty sick kids to te park! I have experienced many times at the gym day care and now I have no problem saying something...plus kids dont want to be at the park or the gym when their sick...so rude! Your not alone in your feelings :)

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  15. When I read this my first thought was, yes that seems to be the way it goes, but does it have to be? If people don't stand up for it then it just keeps happening, but maybe if more people did what you did it would change. It always makes me mad when parents don't parent! You're the one who brought them here, YOU are the one who gets the say!

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  16. Ack. This beyond infuriates me. INFURIATES. Mainly? The parents who don't watch their bully kids (and I mean, real bullies--not just toddlers who like to give hugs like Ashley mentioned) causes me to go into convulsions. not really, but almost. When I see them on the bench reading a magazine? Seriously? I blogged about this a few months ago. Irritating. So so irritating. And seriously? Sick snotty kids DO NOT belong at the park.

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  17. the first time i saw the "toddler bully", i was pissed. a little boy pushed e down and then had the nerve to. stomp. on. her. back. i kid you not. i saw effing red. i guess it happens, but man, when it happens to your kid. at least your parent apologized. mine? said nothing.

    dang, i'm pissed again.

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  18. My 2 year old has recently become a bit more physical with others. We've had a few "incident reports" from daycare, where he's kicked or hit another child. But he's also been the victim - and we get incident reports on that as well. Of course, I'm embarrassed and feel horrible when it's Tommy who hurt someone, but when it's a report about someone hurting Tommy (including some bites!), my feeling is "well, it's the age...this is what toddlers do." Not that I'm condoning it, but oddly, I'm not upset at the other child or parents. But I do get upset that Tommy hurt someone and that I am not able to get him to stop. I've talked to the teachers, and they've assured me that it's more common than any of us probably realize, but they do the incident reports so that in another 2 years if it's still happening, we aren't finding out about it for the first time. We talk to Tommy each time we get a report, and we've also addressed it at home since both Mommy and Daddy have been the recipients of some kicks recently.

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  19. I dont take my toddler to parks where other kids are yet but I hope if we run into a bully toddler at a park, that the parent will apologize and acknowledge that their kid was a jerk.

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  20. I think is the norm is either adjust to the rules of the playground or have your child isolated at home. I have come to the realization parents bring their children to the playground to have some time off their children (some not all)so in our playground trips I'm at all times with her to either save her or correcter. Also, in terms of illness that is something that I really can't control. she goes to school and has a bug 80% of the time. in that case, sorry but not really my daughter will nor be isolated.

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