October 12, 2011

SO WHAT! Wednesday

This weeks guest post comes from my other half, my soul mate, my sister from another mister, KLaw.  I have never "met" someone more like myself and I can honestly say that my life is better with her in it.  
Can you believe that the fabulous Missus Dew allowed me to wreak havoc on her blog today? I'm KLaw. Shannon is my mayjah girl crush, due in part to the fact that she is literally the same person as me inside that fabulous little noggin of hers. We share a brain... all the way from Ohio to South Florida. If only we could share a bottle of vino IRL, I'd be a happy girl. And her husband would probably divorce her because I'd never leave. Kinda like that wart you keep trying to freeze off, but just keeps coming back for more.
I bring to you my first official SWW, complete with far too many curse words and more poop talk than you probably wish to here.
so what if my kid stands on tables and riffles through his daycare teachers purse. at least he isn't eating his own shit like he did last week. true story.
  • so what if i look forward to the nights that my husband works late. i enjoy my peace and quiet (and not feeling pressure to hide that 3rd glass of vino from him)
  • so what if I strategically plan my leg shaving for potential nookie days. 5 days of growth? who gives a shit if Husband isn't rubbin all up on me.
  • so what if if I purposely wear close toed shoes when clearly opened toed would go better just because I don't feel like touching up my polish.
  • so what if while rocking my son to sleep for the umpteenth time last week, i wiped my my drippy nose on his pajama shirt. and then proceeded to laugh at myself for how ridiculous I am. risk waking him up so that i could grab a tissue? no thanks.
  • so what if I come to work a half hour early so that I can work on my side business. its the only time I can find to myself these days besides peeing. and somehow even that gets interrupted by little fingers grabbing at me.
  • so what if i ate an entire bag of candy corn for breakfast. with a mountain DEW. better than my college diet of Marlboro Lights and Coke (acola thankyouverymuch). at least now i'll only rot from the inside out instead of the outside in.
  • so what if I listen to the Golden Oldies station at work. I am clearly meant for the 30's and 40's. This whole Y2K, land of the iPoops and cars that steer themselves makes me want to break open the bomb shelter and a can of spam and hide out until my son throws me into a nursing home.
  • so what if I look forward to said nursing home so that I have a legit excuse to shit my pants and sleep all day.
Special thanks to my lovah for having me invade her space this week. See you dolls around the blogs!

p.s.  you can still sign up to guest post on SWW. shoot me an email shannon.r.dew{at}gmail{dot}com


  1. I die. KLaw is the woman I see myself as whenever I get around to popping out children.

  2. Thanks for letting me eff up your space today! Lover you!

  3. That is awesome!! I have wiped my dripping nose on my kids pj's before. I figured she already her snot on them so why not add mine also!!

  4. Love the honesty, keep up the good work Kristen!

  5. Oh that's too funny. I soooooo relate to the hubby working late fun times, the nookie shave and the closed toe shoes!!!! What a riot!?! Love it.

  6. Such sweet little so what's... I think I am loving them all that you had :)

  7. OMG love KLAW, and you too of course. :)