February 16, 2012

Bragging Rights

I don't remember where or when I read this quote, hell I don't even remember the exact quote, but it went something like this, "don't write/share things to show off or make others 'jealous', write/share things because you love them, are proud of them".  Or something like that.
Ever since the day I read that it has stuck with me.  Like glue.  Like white on rice. So true.
I often find myself reading things, blogs, tweets, posts on Facebook, and I find myself thinking, "this person can't be serious".  I know I'm not alone in this.  I'm sure said person{s} don't intend to come off sounding like they are bragging or showing off or trying to "prove" something, but it sure seems like it.
I think this came to the surface {again} with all the Valentine's day posts, pictures, comments, etc.  I came across several "things" that just really rubbed the wrong way.  That seemed very, "LOOK how sweet MY husband is" or "LOOK at what I GOT!" aka "you all should be jealous of me, my swag, my husband, & my marriage is better than yours".
But this isn't just on Valentine's day, this is something that happens every day in the Internets.  Whether it's child-rearing, home decorating or fashion sense, there are some people that just like to one up everyone. I don't like one-uppers.  
The things that chaps my ass is that things like these just make other people feel bad about themselves.  It makes them question their {probably} perfectly fine relationship.  Makes them feel like a big, fat, mom fail.  Makes them feel ugly.
All this does is make me wonder, what is going on that we don't know about?  I mean, to me, it seems like something must be going on behind closed doors to make them crave the approval and sort of worshiping they receive when they post such things. 
I share things because they are important to me, because I love them, or because I hope it helps someone else.  I hope I never come off as bragging or showy or look-at-me.  If you ever feel that way about me please slap me in the face and take away my wine as punishment.
Photobucket

33 comments:

  1. I have never felt that way about any of your posts, and I would hope that nobody has ever felt that way about any of mine...people are low...and desperate for the approval of others, and I think that's just dumb. I think this is a really good post, Shannon! Have a great day with your little KP!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Replies
    1. AGREE. You freaking rock my face off for putting this out there. I know I've been guilty before, but hot damn some people are out of control.

      Delete
  3. i think to some degree any blogger is a *show-off* (and i mean that in the nicest way possible)... but there are extremes to being a show-off & when you do it simply to make yourself feel better than others or to make others feel bad -- well then you are just an a-hole!
    you never come across as a show-off -- you are quite humble & if anything direct attention to your non-sugar-coated reality -- that's what makes you likeable & so relateable!

    ReplyDelete
  4. i think to some degree any blogger is a *show-off* (and i mean that in the nicest way possible)... but there are extremes to being a show-off & when you do it simply to make yourself feel better than others or to make others feel bad -- well then you are just an a-hole!
    you never come across as a show-off -- you are quite humble & if anything direct attention to your non-sugar-coated reality -- that's what makes you likeable & so relateable!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I TOTALLY agree with you. Especially yesterday, not only in the blogging world, but also on facebook, IG and everywhere else it was "oooh, look what I got".

    While I think "good for you", in the back of my mind, I wonder what they're trying to prove.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I think a lot depends on who your readers are and who you are 'speaking to' on your blog. I agree w/ thechunkygoddess on that a blog kind of is a way to document and show stuff off that's happening in your life. I'm trying to think of a blog that really brags, but maybe I just don't follow any? Or maybe I'm super guilty of it so I don't notice when others do it? Yikes! I sure hope not. I am a new follower of your blog and I absolutely think you're as real as it gets... LOVE IT!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Thank you Shannon!!!! I see the same thing and want to vom in my mouth because is it really necessary to do these things? No! And is it fair that some people might even feel like complete shit because (for me) we are on a budget and can't afford lavish gifts for each other or even a super fancy dinner out? Sheesh I'm sorry- I need to stop- thank you for this!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Alright! I get it. You didn't like that I made Starbucks Gold. You don't have to blog about it.

    Jokes.

    I know you care about everything you post about and I hope that I come off the same way...at least, most of the time.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Bravo mama! I don't think you ever come off in a braggy manner. If you do, we'll gladly have your wine :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. I love this post :-) I feel the exact same way. I see so many posts on facebook and other places online saying things like "I have the best husband/boyfriend/fiance EVER, be jealous!" I'm always under the impression that these relationships are lacking something, or trying to prove something. I never post crap like that because I have nothing to prove. I'm happy and comfortable in my marriage and that's all I care about.

    - Val (Knot Tied Down)

    ReplyDelete
  11. When I read tweets, blog posts, facebook updates where the women are "bragging" about Lord knows what... I always tell myself " who are they trying to convince?"
    My husband is great, my daughter is great and I'm happy most of the time. What is my purpose in broadcasting this for everyone to read??? To make others envious?
    Great post Shannon!

    ReplyDelete
  12. So weird... I was JUST about to post about one-uppers. They rank at the top of my pet peeve list. Be happy with YOUR life, and don't feel the need to make others feel less special. I feel like one-uppers are compensating for something that's missing in their own lives, which is sad in itself.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I totally agree! I'm new to blogging but I think my epic fails and funny "I can't believe this shit happened" stories are the most interesting for me to write and hopefully for people to read. I just eat up the funny stuff, like your people watching at the mall...loved!

    P.S. I also love the use phrases like "chaps my ass". Haha :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. I agree that whenever someone posts about how amazing their husband/boyfriend/significant other is on FB, it always makes me wonder why they feel the need to publically announce these things. Of course, I just posted this huge list yesterday on my blog (which VERY few people read) about all the reasons I love my husband and daughter. It was more to document this time in our lives and a sort of love letter to him letting him know that I appreciate all he does. I guess it's all about the tone of things. A fine line, to be sure! Since my blog is mostly about boogers and stories of me being an idiot, hopefully people don't think I was bragging!

    ReplyDelete
  15. "Chaps my ass" YOU ARE HYSTRICAL!!! I couldn’t agree more with this post!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I can't say anything else but AMMMMMMMMMMMMEN momma. I felt the same way on VDAY, and a lot of other times too. Glad I'm not the only one!

    and the only thing you "show off" about is how full your wine is, and for that i'm truly jealous... because my house is usually on empty :)You rock. Period.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hi! I've never commented before, but I LOVE your blog and how real you are. This bragging crap is the exact reason I stopped blogging. Everyone in my blog circle was doing that and it made me want to vomit! I have a kid and everything I saw on others' blogs made me think I was doing everything wrong. Nice post!

    ReplyDelete
  18. No worries, mama, you never come across that way! I hope I don't, either :) I'm sure I have in the past...I mean, we do put our lives on the internet for all to see...but it's super annoying when people are repeat offenders. I just stop following and keep on my merry way!

    ReplyDelete
  19. So glad to see someone else out there thinks this and it's not just me..

    I recently started reading a blog I won't mention and she post everything her husband gives her. With links to show it on the site. Nothing has ever been under 500 dollars.. Like seriously? That's a car payment in this house. HA

    Thank you for posting this.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. "A to the freakin MEN"!!!!!! SO SO SO true!!! I just love you!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. So true! I was just about to make a post on why I don't have a Facebook anymore!

    ReplyDelete
  22. LOVE. I have nothing to add except you're awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Well said my friend. I have to admit I am guilty of bragging to make another jealous. Shameful. But perfect I am not.

    ReplyDelete
  24. It's so funny you decided to write about this because I have been feeling the exact same way.

    I actually read an article not too long ago about how Facebook was making people depressed. People always want to show their "best" so by reading about other people's "awesome lives", it made people feel bad about themselves for not having things as great. I feel like that's totally applicable here too.

    I've noticed the same things you have, and I feel like blogger makes me feel like my life is boring, etc. There are cliques and it feels like everyone just tries to out-do each other, like you mentioned. I finally had to snap out of it and tell myself that I started blogging for ME. Not anyone else. I have no one to f&%$king impress here, I only have my story to tell.

    So rock on & tell your story, because no matter what else someone has, no one is YOU.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Definitely agree with you on this one. One uppers in real life & bloggerland are the worst!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Towards the end...the sentence where you say 'whats going on behind closed doors....that they are are craving attention..." that's it to a T. Nailed it. I have one sweet sweet special person in my life that talks to me about her marital problems...and then goes on instagram and post all these things about how much she loves him, how great he is...you get the point. But in my mind I wanna say... "IS THIS THE SAME MAN WE TALKED ABOUT THIS MORNING???" It's just a shame folks can't be happy in their own skin enough to just keep it real. Preach on sister!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Thank you for this post. It really made me think.

    I don't feel like I've ever felt like any of the blogs I read or bloggers I follow on Twitter or my friends on FB are bragging when they are posting, tweeting, FB'ing --- probably because I just didn't really think about it too much or take the time/effort to read in to it enough to notice.

    Recently I've had this revelation about myself that I had been posting certain things on mu personal Facebook to "gain attention" so I've kind of been not posting lately. I was shocked when I realized that I was doing that. I'm hoping it had something to do with my personal feelings of disconnection with the world since I've been unemployed for over a year and spend the majority of my time at home, alone. Though when it comes to my blogging, I've never felt this way. And I think that is because I blog for myself, not to gain readership or followers or whatever --- not that I don't enjoy the interaction with readers/followers because I TOTALLY DO but I don't blog for them, I blog for me. I'm like you --- I blog about what I love and things/events that are important to ME.

    Anyways, I've always enjoyed your blog and I've never felt like you were "braggy" or whatever.

    You pretty much "rock my socks" :)

    ReplyDelete
  28. It's too bad we aren't friends on FB because I think you would have liked my Valentine's Day status. :)

    ReplyDelete
  29. he Chaussures Puma answer is yes Ray Ban Sunglasses. French fashion house has confirmed the Brit model as the face of their Boy Chanel handbag collection Chaussures Supra Pas Cher. [Karl Lagerfeld] a crush with this unique, charismatic dude, who's both one and musician, during the photo shoot several months ago, Chanel told WWD Chanel Sunglasses. This previously unforeseen alliance finally became self-evident Chaussures Puma Pas Cher. Alice Dellal represents the most perfect incarnation off which is unique in regards to the Boy Chanel handbag collection, which strives [to be] not even close conformist notions of femininity.
    Yep, Dellal is anything but conventional Ray Ban Sunglasses sale. And even her trademark punk-rock uniform, the petite 24-year-old is actually a drummer while in the band Thrush Metal and will remain found larking for the streets based in london with Pixie Geldof. Shes far from blonde bombshell Blake Lively, whos the existing face of Chanels Mademoiselle range, but Lagerfeld is acknowledged for his eclectic taste, previously casting Lily Allen for the Cocoon bag range during the past year. Even greater, Alice's androgyny will work brilliantly with the 'Boy' collection Chaussures Supra. How refreshing Oakley Sunglasses.

    ReplyDelete