Life After I "Dew"

Well folks, we're officially one week into the 2016-17 school year and I still feel like I'm in a total daze.

Part of me was excited for the school year but mostly it was excitement over the cooler temps {which have yet to arrive} than anything else.  I do like having a schedule/knowing what's happening for the day but not as much as I like being carefree.  I am not one of those mom's who is doing a little dance in the car on my way home from drop-off.  Nope, I'm the one sitting in the car-rider line watching until I can no longer see my girl and she's safely inside the building.

I vividly remember my aunt being sad about the start of school each year my cousins had to return.  I remember her saying how she didn't want school to start and how she just loved summer break so much.  She liked being able to stay up late, skip a bath here and there, come and go as you please, that carefree-ness of summer.  It was a much different tune than most moms sang and I always thought it was sweet.  It took for me to become a mom of a school-aged kid to really appreciate her sadness for school starting.

Guys, we bring these tiny little humans into the world.  We have no clue what we are doing as new parents but one thing we instinctively know/do is protect them and love them.  We pick our registry items based on what is "safest" and we google "best infant car seat".  We are our babies number one source for all things from kissing boo-boos to feeding them breakfast, lunch, and dinner to squeezing their guts because they're so dang cute.  They rely on us and we love them unconditionally {as they do us} and no one else has that bond with them.

The school years start and for the first time they have to rely and trust someone else.  They are out of our care more hours of the day than they're in our care.  All we can do from that point on is hope and pray that the lessons we taught them up to this point have prepared them {somewhat} for this new phase of life.  That, to me, is terrifying.

Did I talk about stranger danger enough?
Did I talk about it too much?
Did I teach her how to open her applesauce?
What if she misses me?
Will her teacher know what she needs?
Who will she eat lunch with?
What kind of kids will she befriend?
What if she can't find the bathroom?
What if she get scared?
Does she know how much I love her?
When will she have a snack?
Will she be kind to everyone she meets?
Will they be kind to her?
Is she happy?

These are just some of the thoughts I have throughout the day.

Just as I know that the sky is blue, I know that this phase will come and go and we will survive.  I'm sure a time will come when I am blasting "I'm So Excited" as I pull away from the front doors of that school.  But for now it is bittersweet even if I am a "seasoned" 1st grade mom. I also know that I will have these same exact emotions when James starts school so #HelpMeTomCruise.