May 10, 2013

Do You Drink In Front of Your Kid{s}

Last week I was chatting with my...cousin-in-law{?} about God, our faith, our marriages, raising our babies in this crazy world, etc and she brought up a point that I had not thought about and that was the influence of drinking {alcohol} in front of our children.

Obviously I'm not currently consuming any alcoholic beverages due to my pregnant state but I have been known to have a glass of wine or order a beer in Kendall's presence.  I'm not talking shit-faced, wasted, drunk but a drink here and there.  I've never really thought much of it, it's "mommy juice".  Jimmy is the same way.

Over the weekend we heard Kendall say, "that's daddy's beer" and we both looked at each other, shit...this is not good.  Jimmy corrected her saying, "no that's a yucky pop", same difference, babe.  And we both agreed that we did NOT like the fact that the word "beer" was a part of our almost three-year-old's vocabulary.  Parent fail.

My cousin-in-law brought up a good point, she said, "we wouldn't watch an R-rated movie {sex, drugs, violence, cussing} in front of them" and that hit me like a ton of bricks.  Drinking is essentially the same.  It's an adult thing.  Whether you call it a "yucky pop" or "mommy juice" or drink it from a red Solo cup, it is what it is.

I'm not going to sit here and say that we are a changed family and that we are not going to be drinking in front of her {and future baby brother} at all, ever, anymore because I know that, even though I'm pregnant, there are days where I'm all, "pour me a drink" {no I'm not drinking while pregnant nor do I condone it}.  With the arrival of our new bundle of joy brings on a whole new set of "headaches" which will leave me wanting some "mommy juice" by the end of the day. Jimmy has been limiting his "yucky pops" and hasn't been drinking at all through the week, just the weekends, but still in her presence.


So I got to thinking, do you drink in front of your kids?  Do they know what "beer" is?  If they're old enough do you explain to them that this is for grown ups?  How do you handle this tricky situation?



45 comments:

  1. Honestly, it's something I never really thought about for the reasons you shared. My husband and I have definitely limited our drinking in front of our son {22 months}, mostly because he thinks he can share whatever we're drinking, especially if it has a straw. So far, he hasn't actually taken a sip, but there have been a few close calls.

    To begin with, though. We aren't huge drinkers. My husband may have a beer while he's grilling dinner one night or I might have a glass of wine while we sit on the deck in the evenings while our son plays, but again, those times are few and far between, maybe once a week or every few weeks.

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  2. I've never really thought about this before either....I mean, when we go out to eat, Andy will order a beer and I'll order whatever drink I'm in the mood for, but Chloe has never thought twice about it. I don't think I've ever heard the word "beer" come out of her mouth. She knows about Mommy's coffee and diet coke, but that's about the extent of it. LOL! But that is a good, valid point that you make. Great post!

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  3. Growing up, my dad always drank in front of us and so did everyone else in my family. It never bothered me and I don't think anyone thought it was a big deal. My brother once accidentally drank my grandpa's bourbon and thought it was apple juice, he was 4 and everyone just laughed it off. I think being drunk in front of your child is another story, having a beer at dinner or a glass of wine is not that big of a deal in my eyes.

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  4. Never really thought about it since I obviously don't have kids but this is def. something to think about. I'm assuming I will have a drink occasionally in front of my future kids but it's best to show kids to be responsible. You don't have to worry about K drinking booze anytime soon, but I think it's important for her as she gets older to see mom and dad doing 'adult things' responsibly.

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  5. I think it is all how you talk to them about it. She's knows that it is a mommy and daddy thing, so that helps. As she gets older just talk to her about the responsibilities that go along with it. She's going to see it everywhere, at least she can learn from mom and dad what's the right way to go about it.

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  6. My parents never drank in front of me but I think that in a way hurt me when I got to the age to make that decision for myself. I figured oh well I can drink as much as I want no big deal. But looking back my aunt and uncle drank in front of my cousins and they still get way out of control.

    I have no children but I do have a nephew and my in-laws drink like fish in front of him. I don't condone drinking glass after glass of wine or beer after beer but I don't see where one is wrong either. It's all about what you teach your children about drinking and alcohol in my opinion. Better for your children to see you doing it and how to be responsible about vs. somebody else.

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  7. I'm allergic to alcohol, so I obviously don't drink, but Skip never drinks in front of the kids. It's just something we decided early on when we had Emmy, that he would only drink once she had gone to bed. A huge part of it is because whether I'm home or not, we don't want him having had even one drink and having to drive the girls somewhere. Sure, Skip is someone who can have 3 or 4 and be totally fine to drive, but it's just not worth it in our opinion. So drinking only happens after bedtime and he'll only get kinda drunk if I'm home. {not that he'd get drunk by himself, haha, but if he has friends over I have to be home if he's gonna get drunk in case the girls need us}

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  8. See the thing for us is there are lots of things that are "mommy things" and "daddy things." We wouldn't let Rowan taste our 4-star pad thai because it's "hot and spicy mommy noodles" and we wouldn't let her just go to town on our computers because "that's daddy's work 'puter." We just do our best to demonstrate a healthy, adult relationship with all things - beer, food, wine, exercise, television viewing - and it's OK for her to know that some things are totally off limits to her right now.

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  9. I agree with K, it's about how it's talked about. My 5 year old niece has always known my family has some wine drinkers in it and she knows it's explicitly for adults only. She actually loves to feel like one of us so we give her a smaller wine glass with some lemonade in it and she loves it. She says "Cheers!" and gets to feel like one of the big girls.

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  10. this might just be me, but I don't see it as a big deal. My parents have always drank in front of me, there is always alcohol/tons of wine at family parties and holidays. No one EVER over-drank though, it was always done responsibly. So I grew up with it, and it was normal. It was never taboo for me, and I think because of that, I learned how to drink responsibly. I know some people who grew up the complete opposite of me; drinking was something that was absolutely forbidden, so when they grew up, they went a little crazy with it. I know this isn't always the case, but that's my experience! Obviously I wouldn't want my children to see me sloppy drunk, but I think a little wine/beer is fine at the end of the day :-)

    - Val @ KnotTiedDown.com

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  11. We do something similar to what you and Jimmy have implemented. Connor is very, VERY observant. He can tell you the difference between a pop can and a beer can (we totally thought we were tricking him). So, after we realized we weren't fooling him - we decided to start watching it! I don't really drink at all, but Shawn will have a beer with dinner or when we're out to dinner. He's started waiting until after C is in bed most nights to have one. I do think it's okay for them to see and it prompts a good discussion about the difference between adult things vs. child things - but personally, we decided we didn't want him to see that every single day.

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  12. I find this topic interesting. The perspective between the USA and Europe is SO different. I believe the cussing is a respect thing. And drinking is a learning/teaching opportunity. I am the biggest health, organic nut around. I mean heaven forbid someone have a cigerette anywhere in a 10 mile radius of my precious baby, and those sugary sweet "juice" drinks for my baby HELL TO THE NO, however that being said I do have a drink occassionally around her. My parents arent drinkers but they did occassionally drink around us and taught us it is a responsibility thing. I hope I can instill the same in my daughter. Teaching her right from wrong, to be responsible (not drinking until you're of age and having a designated driver) etc etc. While I do not want her to see her father or I "drunk" per say, I want her to see us enjoying life and her enjoying it with us. Dancing at a wedding, taking a stroll through a vineyard or a hike up the mountain, and if sitting on the deck with a beer or wine is part of our enjoyment - I am fine with her seeing that... I never want to HIDE anything from her. I want her to know me, as me, completely.

    This parenting thing is hard and my kid is only ONE. I cannot imagine what I am going to say at oh 13 :)

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  13. I literally just thought of this last night, as my husband was bustin' his ass putting in our new hardwood stairs, he cracked open a beer. My hand immediately went on my belly and I couldn't believe how fast the thought came to me, what will we do when the baby is here? I joke that I want a margarita and an italian sub immediately after I give birth, actually maybe it's not a joke, but still... is it okay to drink a, usually gigantic at a restaurant, margarita with a baby in tow? Lots to think about!

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  14. We drink in front of Chase. The topic came up when we were planning his first birthday. My friend didn't want to have alcohol at her son's party so he learned you could have fun without drinking. My mom is a glass of wine after work person. I don't remember it as much growing up. My dad occasionally drank but was very honest about drinking too much when he was younger and throwing up or drinking and driving. He always told me he would pick me up or pay for a cab. I don't know if there is a perfect way to handle alcohol. My in laws drink a lot to this day. Like were hung over at Chase's 2nd birthday party. Their kids seem to be ok with alcohol. Maybe you should talk to some of the Mormon bloggers. I know one that doesn't drink. But more than likely Kp will be like you and enjoy a drink once in awhile.

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  15. I can't wait to read all these comments.

    We drink beer in front of our children. Hadley(2.5) knows it's beer. She thinks anything in a can is beer. She says she doesn't like beer and knows it's for mommy and daddy. She saw me drinking a Red Bull in the car while driving and said, "Is that your beer mommm?" I just said no it's not beer and that was that. I think if we make it a big deal it will be a big deal and the sooner she will want to drink it. At first I thought oh no....we HAVE to stop drinking in from of her, but why? She's going to see it as she gets older. I would rather her see her parents drinking it responsibly for many years rather than her first time seeing it is at some high school party. Also, I lived in Spain while in college and they have wine with their children all the time and they don't grow up to be drunks. I think it's totally fine to let your children know what beer is and see their parents drink it. I might have a problem when someday she tells her teacher mommy was drinking beer on the way here today. That could be funny.

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  16. We drink in front of our children. And honestly, I don't think its a big deal. As long as, like you said, youre not shit faced drunk, I think its ok. Actually, I think kids NEED to know that there are things they cant do that their parents can. My daughter (almost 4) knows what a beer can looks like and points it out at the store, but my son (2) calls it Daddy's water. They don't know WHAT alcohol is and the effects it has on us. But I think as long as it is not out of control, then its an OK thing.

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  17. I'm not a drinker so I dont drink in front of my son obviously. I guess I see it differently than everyone else. I hate going to a restaurant where there are kids at the table and both parents are drinking. Yea it may be one drink but what happens if you get pulled over on the way home and the officer smells alcohol. How do you explain that one. I just think it is very irresponsible.

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  18. My parents drank in front of me and I don't ever remember thinking anything of it. I (not currently in my pregnanty state) drink in front of my son, who is almost 7. He knows the different between an "adult drink" and a "kid drink". I am sure he has said the word beer before but I guess I really never thought anything about it, since there is root beer for the kiddos. This is a great point but I guess I never really thought it was a big deal. I think I am going to ask my hubby what he thinks about this, I don't think we will change our ways but it's a conversation piece.... Thanks for the topic, I can't wait to read the others responses.

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  19. What a non-issue. Obviously, getting shit-faced in front of your kids is wrong. But unless you're a Mormon or a Baptist and believe that alcohol is wrong, period, I'm not sure why you would think it's wrong to have a drink in front of your kid, nor do I understand why it's inherently bad that a kid know what beer is.

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  20. I don't think there is anything wrong with an adult responsibly consuming an alcoholic beverage in front of their children. I don't think watching a rated R (violent or racy) movie in front of your child is comparable to consuming an alcoholic beverage. I won't watch that when my kids are around because I don't want to expose them to bad language, scary situations or sexual activity at a young age. If you teach your children that alcohol is only allowed to be consumed at the legal age, and that you don't condone underage drinking in your house, and you drink and act responsibly in front of your children, you are not damaging then by having a glass of wine with dinner or a beer with friends. Remembering back to my childhood, I would never have thought anything of adults drinking alcohol because I knew I wasn't allowed to until I was 21. It is all about talking to your kids and setting the boundaries of what is and isn't acceptable in your house.

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  21. I agree with Kara. I don't think that comparing it to a R-rated movie is accurate at all. Having a kid watch two hours of Freddie Krueger is not the same as having a beer while you're fixing the deck. If anything, drinking is more comparable to driving a car. There are some things that only adults do. Like it or not, you can't drive til you're 16. And like it or not, you can't drink beer until you're 21.

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  22. My parents drank in front of me. A glass of wine at dinner and maybe a beer for my dad while watching a sports game. When I was younger my friends whose parents didn't drink in front of them (or never) would make comments but as I got older I realized it's not harmful. If anything it taught me that drinking is okay to do in moderation and it is an adult thing to do once I become legal. When I turned 19 it was okay to try stuff. It taught me that drinking isn't a bad thing. I think hiding it will make it worse because children will know that it's a "bad thing" and will be willing to try it way to young/ to much at one time. Might become sneaky. Like Kara said, children have to taught the rules with these things.

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  23. I grew up with my parents drinking casually in front of me and I actually think it's a good thing. I think seeing things in moderation and knowing it's an "adult thing" is okay. We wear makeup in front of toddlers and we don't let them go out looking all done up toddler's in tiaras style, and I think it's a similar circumstance. I think as long as it's being consumed responsibly and it's never left unattended with a child (so they could accidentally consume it) that it's just fine in my book. PS my kiddo at 2 years old would see the beer in the grocery store and say "dat daddy's" and we just laughed. At least he isn't asking for one! ;)

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  24. I am also in the 'not a big deal' camp. I had many sips of beer by the time I was 2.75yrs old. My son hasn't had any. We don't drink soda at all. It's pretty much water or wine in this house. My son has never asked about it. Some things are for grown ups, some for kids. I eat french fries in front of my son, but I let him have exactly one- no more & if he doesn't ask he doesn't get any. That's how we handle it, it's not a problem in our house. I wouldn't care if my son knew the words beer or wine. I guess I'm not seeing the issue. We served alcohol at my son's first birthday party!

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  25. I wanted to add (but couldn't edit my comment) that I also drink coffee. My son knows it's Mommy's coffee- no problem with that either. To me it's no different than beer or wine. For what it's worth, I have friends who let their toddlers try their coffee & guess what- they liked it and now they little bits of it (and she works in the medical profession). Anyways- if beer is bad, is coffee bad? Is soda then bad too? I wouldn't want my child drinking any of them, but we drink them in front of them.

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  26. Yes, I absolutely do. I do adult things in front of my children because I am an adult. They will grow up in the real world, where adults do adult things, and need appropriate models of such behavior.

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  27. I remember my parents drinking in front of me when I was younger, youngest about seven. They would never get shwasty pants or anything, but I knew that I couldnt have their drinks and that it was for grown ups. It didn't really affect me at all, I just knew that dad drank beer and that it was for grown ups and that mom drank margaritas and they were for grown ups too. The only thing "grown up" we drank was coffee. My mom would give my little sister a lot of milk and a little coffee so she could be a big girl and did it very sparingly , I never liked the stuff. Overall, it's a personal choice and what works for you and what you want KP and little man to know or not know.

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  28. Yep, Lizzy knows the word "beer". Since Justin brews, which is kind of a whole-day process, it was inevitable. Lizzy knows that drinking beer is something that you can do if you want, after you turn 21. Just like we tell her that driving is something that she can do if she wants once she is 16. I think it's fine to teach kids that they are not adults and ha ve different rules and expectations in our house than the adults do.

    Personally, I think modeling appropriate consumption of alcohol is KEY for kids, and creates a whole lot fewer issues later on than demonizing alcohol does.

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  29. Drinking in front of my daughter was never an issue when she was younger. I wasn't an incredibly heavy drinker anyway, but I would have a glass of wine...sometimes two...in her presence. Her daddy would do the same with a beer. Since it wasn't an issue and it wasn't something we thought we needed to be ashamed of, we never gave it a second thought. She always knew it was for grown ups only, and that was that. I worked for a winery for a while, Kirsten was 10 when I started there, and she would come to work with me sometimes. She learned all about the wine making process and actually learned to appreciate all the work that goes into winemaking. So we've never considered wine or beer a big deal, at all.

    Shannon, I think if you hide it from your kids, they're going to assume that having a beer or a glass of wine is "bad". And when they get older and want to explore, they're going to drink and hide it from you because they think that YOU think that it's bad. If having an occasional drink is part of your lifestyle, then just let it be. Don't stress over it, it's not a big deal that your child knows the word "beer"; it's not a dirty word! :)

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  30. My parents and family and friends all drank in front of me growing up. They wouldn't be wasted but they definitely drank. Is it bad to show your kid that you can drink responsibly? I don't think so. I think it's better to see responsible people drinking. If you hide it from them and they find out, is it "bad" in their eyes? I think it's best to be honest- is a grownup "treat"

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  31. when i was little (3-4 years old) i would 'waitress' for my parents. i'd get the pizza pan out, put a beer on it (i knew which ones were moms & which were dads) then i'd bring it to them in the living room and expect a tip. granted my mom is a bar/resurant manager (and has been most of my life) so i was coping that behavior from her. but i turned out ok. i didn't drink at all in high school, i'd say i was a normal college student when it came to consumption, and now i'm a 26 year old youth director who has a few glasses of wine a week. as long as you and jimmy are both resonsible (which i'm sure you are!) i don't think you're doing any damage to kendall or baby brother.

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  32. Well first thing is that my Husband and I don't drink at all, like ever. So my kids are never around alcohol at home. But I do have family and friends that drink, which is fine, but if I know there will be drinking, we usually stay home. The only exception is *maybe* wine. But that's it. No judgements on those that drink, but it's a personal decision that my Husband and I have made for our family. My kids don't need to be around alcohol.

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  33. usually the hubby and i will order a drink if were out for dinner (not while being preggo) or will have some drinks at the lake & thats about it. i assume little man will see us drinking? he will DEFINITELY see my family drinking out at the lake. but i wonder if ordering a samuel adams this time and a miller light next time vs the word BEER would mean he wouldnt catch on as quick?! oh man. i have no idea! what a good thing to consider!

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  34. I don't have kids nor am I pregnant or even married, but have already thought about this a considerable amount. I don't drink often, but when I do its ONE Cape Cod. I don't like the feeling of losing control. Plus, I'm not down okay with drinking that many empty calories. My boyfriend's family on the other hand will get shit faced in front of their children (toddlers through 12yo) and that's something I'm absolutely not okay with. Even at a family party or the lake. One of them will even send her 12yo to fetch her a beer. Um, HELL NO. That's completely, 100% inappropriate.

    My boyfriend drinks on occasion as well, but will get drunk at the lake. Being a guy, I highly doubt that this is something he's thought about and when I'm pregnant, it's a discussion we will have. I don't think we will eliminate all alcohol in front of our children, but it will become a rarity, for sure.

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  35. I don't often drink at home. I just don't usually enjoy it enough to warrant the extra calories. I'd rather have a milkshake ;) My husband does love to drink a beer or two in the evenings and our son has seen him drink. For a while, he referred to it as coffee-another thing he knows is off limits, but now he does say beer. I don't have a problem with it. Like another commenter said, there are quite a few things that are off limits to him now-coffee, soft drinks, the computer, alcohol. As he gets older, I think it's good for him to see alcohol as something that can be enjoyed responsibly (we would never be drunk in front of him) and sometimes we're more curious about stuff that is taboo. We actually decided recently that we needed to stop drinking soda at our house because we didn't want it to be seen as a go to drink, but rather as something for special ocassions like parties or out to eat. We'd rather have him make a healthy choice instead.

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  36. Yea, we don't think it's a huge deal either. But we are the one-drink type of people. Usually beer. I don't think Emeline knows the word "beer"---we usually just say that it's mommy's drink or daddy's drink and she knows she can't touch it. Since, I obviously drink things like soda (bad me) or whatever, she knows she can't touch that either. She doesn't seem to really mind. If we go out to dinner on a Friday or Saturday night, we'll totally order a beer, even with our kids there. Sometimes I think making things a big deal can make it a big deal when they become "free"--so seeing it modeled in a controlled way is probably not a hugely bad thing, you know? Just my take. I definitely grew up seeing my dad have a beer at dinner after a long day at work, and I don't remember any weird feelings about it. I will say, however, a year or two ago someone acted slightly high and mighty around me saying that "I would NEVER take a sip of alcohol in front of my kids" and it did make me feel like, AM I DOING SOMETHING WRONG?! and OMG I NEVER THOUGHT OF THIS. Then I realized, everyone has to have their own boundaries and know what is ok and not ok for them and their kids. For me, it's ok. We are ultra responsible drinkers (when we do) and always within moderation especially if our kids are around.

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  37. My almost two year old calls our drinks "daddy's juice" or "mommy's juice". I have to admit it has crossed my mind that maybe we shouldn't drink in front of her. My parents were total teetotalers and I think it made me very judgmental and even "scared" of alcohol. I don't want my daughter to grow up like that. I think we'll continue to have a drink or two in front of her but save the "a few too many" nights for those times when we have a sitter!

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  38. I will drink around my kids if we are at home or somewhere that I will not soon (2 hours or so/drink) be driving home from. Like most everyone else has said, I think it is important for kids to be exposed to things, even if only for them to understand that it is not BAD, just something that is for grown ups only. Just yesterday I met some friends at a bar to watch a basketball game, and a friend of a friend showed up with her 1.5 year old. Now, all I could think about was Sweet Home Alabama ["There's a baby! In a bar!"], but technically it was a non-smoking, all-ages establishment... The kiddo was being an angel, and it didn't bother me too much... Until I saw the mom drinking 4 beers in the course of an hour and a half, then driving away with her kid in the car. THAT kind of thing I 100% do NOT agree with. I know I wouldn't want my kid drinking even one beer then getting behind the wheel, so why set that "It was only one" example? I think it all comes back to being responsible & acknowledging that you are teaching your kids the right and wrong ways to do things.

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  39. When I was around 10, I was trick-or-treating with my Dad, siblings, and some neighborhood Dads...I had a sip of my dad's beer and it made me not want alcohol for a very long time! Honestly, I don't see anything wrong with having alcohol around your kids, as long as you're drinking responsibly (remember how embarrassing it is when your parents get drunk?). Seeing their parents consume in moderation helps them learn how to drink - and not get super drunk the first time they try. That being said, I understand that it's a personal decision and you should do what feels right - just remember that even though you're a parent you can still have fun too!

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  40. I actually think it's important to drink responsibly around your kids (assuming your family is one in which alcohol is something that the parents partake in). It's important to me that my kids learn what alcohol is, who it is for, and most importantly, how to use it responsibly. If we were drinkers, and we made it strictly off limits for our kids to witness, what are we teaching them about using alcohol? Absolutely nothing - which means we are not taking the opportunity to teach about moderation, no drinking & driving, etc, and leaves them to their own devices to figure it all out.

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  41. I don't. I haven't had a drink since before she was conceived. She is now 13 months old. I just don't feel comfortable drinking while around her, plus I am still nursing her.

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  43. I do drink in front of my kids. Always have. Always will.

    I also curse in front of them, and my husband and I indulge in some lightly heated kisses in their presence.

    In my mind, their innocence has less to do with what we do than with how we frame it. I've explained to my kids, in detail, that alcohol in itself isn't inherently bad. That, like anything else, CAN be bad. If you eat a lot of bad food, you get unhealthy. If you drink too much, you get stupid and can't drive and can kill other people and ruin lives. If you make stupid choices, those choices come back on you.

    Foul language is for adults, because it's not socially appropriate for kids. Mine know that, and in spite of my language in front of them, I've never had a single adult tell me my kids have bad mouths.

    My kids know what beer and wine are. They know me and the husband drink one or two once in awhile. It's not a big deal. Because it's not a big deal, it takes away its power. Things that are forbidden, secret, unknown...those things have power.

    It's why my kids know all about sex, their bodies, boy-girl interactions, puberty, etc. They've been given information in small doses, as is age appropriate, but since they know everything there is to know, there's no mystery. They don't have to get misinformation from their friends because they know the truth from their parents.

    When we give our kids truth, and honesty, and reality from an early age, age-appropriately, they learn that they can trust us. That what we say has value, that they can talk to us about anything.

    Beer isn't a big deal. Wine isn't a big deal. There's no sin or shame or bad in either one, or in our kids seeing us drink. What's not okay is drinking to drunkeness or hiding in and them learning that it's only to be done in secret, that it's shameful, and that there's something forbidden in the whole thing.

    I know these are strong words. I get that so many people will disagree with me. But I just feel really, really strongly about being straight with our kids about life on life's terms.

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  44. We drink responsibility in front of our kids. A margarita at Mexican, a glass or two of wine here and there. NBD. I'd rather them see me drink responsibility than make them think I'd been hiding it all along when they are old enough to discover that we drink. Ya know? That to me creates more of a sense of it being tabu , than just drinking in front of them in moderation.

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  45. I see nothing wrong with drinking responsibly in front of your kids. If your family drinks alcohol then they should learn from you the responsible way to consume it. I don't think there should be cute names for it either. This is mommy's wine, kids don't drink wine, you can have some milk or water. What is wrong with a statement like that? After all, our kids are able to understand that you can drive the car, as an adult, but they cannot.
    I do not think people should drink alcohol in the presence of someone with a drinking problem, we should respect what might be very difficult for that person and not push it. This is very different to me, than not letting your children see you have a drink.
    If your family doesn't drink for religious reasons, then by all means explain to your child why you don't. If they see someone drinking alcohol in a restaurant, it is OK (IMHO) to say, yes that is beer, but we don't drink it because we believe... (insert what you believe).
    I didn't use bad language in front of my children because I didn't believe anyone should use bad language. Since I think it is inappropriate for kids and adults I didn't use it around them and I didn't use it when they weren't around. That is what I believe, but I'm certainly not going to dictate how another adult speaks and if my kids hear something that I think is inappropriate then I'll have a conversation with my kids about it. Not to make the adult look bad, but so that I can teach my children my beliefs.
    Elizabeth

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