Disclaimer: this post should be read in sarcasm font.
A few things that I find especially "awesome" right now include, but are not limited to the following:
- I now, officially, weigh more than my husband. Who wouldn't want to weigh more than their counterpart?
- I haven't been to the dentist in three years. I used to be an every six month kinda girl but then I had a baby.
- I currently sleep with no less than 4 pillows every night.
- Lately Kendall has been thinking it's completely appropriate to wake up at 6am. Not cool, kid, not cool.
- Chipotle brown rice. If you like the taste of cardboard then you might like this otherwise stick with the white stuff, trust.
- Just when I thought the ticks were gone Jimmy found one on his neck. Vampire bugs be gone!
- Kendall refuses to get dressed most days. I've tried bribing her, threatening her, encouraging her, letting her pick out the outfit and locking her in her room. It's a fight no matter what.
- Bending over or standing up after sitting for a while is a chore. I'm about to start considering that my workout for the day.
- Seeing pictures of your skinny self does nothing for your self esteem when you have 3 more months of nothing but weight gain ahead of you.
- Stores that don't accept PayPal. I'm looking at you Old Navy.
- My bangs. I swear they go from being just a tad too short to impossibly hard to style too long in no time flat. It's 2013, haven't we developed a no grow bang solution yet?
- Kendall screamed for almost an hour going to bed. Most nights are like this and much like getting dressed we've tried everything. We've reached the point where we just ignore it now and hope that she gets the picture, SOON.
- Have you guys seen Pingu on Netflix? I'm not sure if it's in another language or no language at all but that show is the epitome of annoying. Kendall loves it, of course.
- Last weekend I drove to four "spas" to get a pedicure the first place turned me away because they had one client when I came in and another coming in an hour and 10 minutes and the other three were closed.
- Calls from blocked numbers. I want to answer so badly because I'm nosy and then I just figure it's a spam call and don't want to get sucked into their evil.
- Buy Buy Baby and Target websites are the most un-user-friendly. Of course these are the two places I registered at.
Whew! Glad I got that off my chest! Hope everyone had a great holiday weekend. Ours was a pretty good, but slightly uneventful one. I spent Sunday night cleaning dried up food off of our dining room chairs while listening to KP scream over the monitor, "I need a drink! I need to go potty! I need a tissue! I'm.So.Sad!!!!!" So that was awesome.