December 3, 2014

Love Your Body, That Is All

Growing up I was never a fit kid.  I never played sports, never exercised.  My eating was just what any kids was.  I ate whatever I wanted.  I was never fat but I was never thin either.  I rode right in the middle and I was always happy with that.

I never thought about the way I looked in terms of my weight/body.  I was just a kid and worried about kid things.  Even as I got older I don't remember ever thinking negative thoughts about my body and I certainly never dieted.  It wasn't until I gained 40lbs from pregnancy that I ever even "went on a diet".  I never really exercised much either.  I joined a gym and worked out with a trainer for a few months before our wedding but as soon as I got pregnant I saw it as an excuse to kick my gym habit.  

I know that the reason I was never obsessed or focused on my body was because of my mom.  While
my mom has dieted over the years she never let that rub off onto me.  She always showed me how to love yourself because no matter what her weight was she always loved herself.  She always took pride in her appearance and she was always happy and smiling.

As I've gotten older and been exposed to more in terms of diet and exercise.  I've seen it all and I've tried a few things a long the way and figured out what worked for me.  I don't believe in starvation or even deprivation.  I don't think you need to work out 7 days a week for 52 weeks.  I do believe that everything in moderation is great.  I think exercising more days than you don't is healthy.  I don't believe in fat shaming or, the newest trend, skinny shaming.

I've been eating an 80/20 Paleo diet for the past 3-4 months and I love what it has done for my body, inside and out.  I have also been doing PiYo for 6 months.  The combination of the two has really changed my body, it's leaned me out and made me more defined.  I've never felt or looked like I do right now and I am proud of the way I look.  I am not done, however.  I know that I can tone up more and really take my body and fitness to the next level.

I am happy with where has come from and where it's at now but it seems others aren't.  That's where the skinny shaming comes in.  I don't even refer to myself as skinny, I never use that word to describe myself because I am not skinny.  I still have curves, I still have jiggly spots, and I still have meat on my bones.  But lately I've been hearing comments like, "girl you NEED to eat" and "you're wasting away" neither of which are supportive or true.  Both of which are hurtful and mean.

I don't talk numbers but I feel like I need to.  I am 5'3 and I have and 31-years-old.  The ideal weight for my height and age is 112-140lbs.  The lowest number I have seen on the scale {because I don't weigh myself often} is 126.4.  That number is pretty much right smack in the middle of where I should be and where I feel comfortable.  I do not think that number qualifies comments like, "if you lose anymore weight...we're going to have to have an intervention".  Yes I've heard that to which I reply, "I am NOT trying to lose anymore weight so you don't need to worry about that" because it's true, I'm not.

What people don't understand when they say those things is that it is like they are negating the hard work I have put in as if all I am doing is starving myself, which couldn't be further from the truth.  I even heard a comment that compared me to a sick person.  As if to say I look unhealthy and sickly myself.  How hurtful?  I work hard, I eat well {for the most part} and take pride in how far I've come while raising two little kids.  To hear such negative comments from people who know me, personally, feels like a slap in the face.  I know they think they are "helping" or being funny but it is anything but.

I am not trying to nor do I want to lose any weight.  I would like to lose body fat and lower my percentage.  I would like to continue eating a mostly Paleo diet.  I would like to continue on the path with PiYo and building those long, lean muscles.  And I would like to see my body change and see what it, what I, am capable of.

And I would like to do all of that with supportive comments, "girl you are looking FIT, high five!" Not that I think everyone needs to tell me I look good, I don't, but if you are going to say something, say something nice.  Remember that age old saying, "if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all"?  That.

I've read so many posts about skinny/fit shaming and I never thought I'd be writing myself and I never wanted to.  I got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore though, I had to speak up and defend myself.  


  1. Those comments do not come come from a place of genuine concern, or worry, especially if from people close to you (because then they should know you're balanced when it comes to food/working out)--it comes from jealousy. That's the ugly truth of it. Keep rocking on and doing the healthy thing for your body. EVERYONE should be working out 3-5 days a week (at least) and eating right. xo

  2. I think you look awesome - fit and healthy. You worked hard for that body and it shows. Double high fives to you.

  3. You ARE fit and look amazing! You have an incredible journey and it's great to see how far you've come. Don't let anyone take this from you!

  4. I feel those that fit-shame are just jealous because they don't have it in them to do the work that you have done. This my not be true but it is what I tell myself. I have watched your journey and I have seen you work.... You got the results you want you LOOK AMAZING! Kudos to you wanting to lead a healthier life!

  5. You look great!!

    I am 5 ft so my ideal weight is 115 to 125. I am 130. I workout, do cleanses, try to eat better and all I ever hear is "you don't need to lose weight, you are fine the way you are" It drives me crazy! I do it because I want to feel comfortable in my clothes and healthy and fit not because I think I need to lose weight. It's a true lifestyle change. I am amazed you have been 80/20 paleo. Tell me your secrets lol

  6. You go girl!! And well done for speaking out - haters gonna hate! You have done so well and you have come so far - your whole lifestyle has changed and you look amazing!! x

  7. People are SO rude. You get it guuurrrllll. You look awesome and should be PROUD of how far you have come! Awesome job. I am PRAYING I get your motivation and can kick my booty into gear!

  8. How about, "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen"? You voluntarily share your life on the internet and then act as if people should not have opinions. You're obviously doing this because you want the feedback. Accept that not everyone is going to worship you and tell you how totes amazeballs you are for "keepin' it real, yo!"

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    2. Oh Angela Angela Angela. It's not that I can't take criticism, I can. It's about "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all". You should try it sometime. And totes amazeballs? Who says that?

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  10. I used to be skinny when I was younger and I remember the day I became a UK size 12 (which I think is about your equivalent of a 8) I was devastated because I thought I was fat. I do want to go back and smack my 19 year old self haha. Anyway this is to say that I used to get stick for being too skinny, you're anoerexic looking (have these people actually ever seen an anorexic?), you need to eat some food (I did, I ate heaps but I was very active) etc etc. It used to really annoy me as no one was ever positive about the fact that I looked good, I worked out, kept healthy and was actually a fairly good example of a college student as I ate quite well and made sure I walked and took exercsie when I could so I totally feel your pain. You look good and you are a great example to your kids. Keep it up girl! As for the totes amazeballs comment from above I have to say I say it all the time because of some stupid reality programme we have here! I started saying it as a joke and now I cant stop :)!

  11. They are just jealous, not that I am not guilty of probably saying it to someone, but it was probably because I was feeling jealous/envious- bahaha. Looking great girl!

  12. Everyone has an opinion. And some people are just mean. Keep on doing what you're doing and focus on your health. You are doing great, and are an inspiration to many people, including me.

  13. Do you have a list of paleo recipes you could send me?

  14. Amen. I'm so glad you wrote this blog post. I have lost 35-ish pounds over the last couple of years, and really toned up and gotten healthy. I can't count the times someone has said something negative to me about my weight loss. I've heard all the comments you have, and they are hurtful. I wish women could just be more supportive of each other. This post really made my day.

  15. Shannon, this post is fantabulous! You look amazing! Hey you can borrow fantabulous for your New Years revolution if you want lol. Anywho it's been over a year since I have posted or blogged or even read blogs very much. I saw this and can totally relate. Girl when I had a lot of steroid weight it was tough hearing comments, it was almost the worse part at times. Now that I have lost nearly fifty lbs I get a comment here or there that is hurtful as well. The you don't look sick comment yeah that one stings cause I have been through so much and still am battling to get in remission but on the flip side I feel blessed that I don't and I can throw on a hair wrap from loosing hair from chemo and apply makeup to cover rashes etc and keep on keeping on! You have Kelly Rippa arms girlie and so many want Kelly Rippa arms! I always think of the Taylor Swift song shake it off and the lyrics haters gonna hate hate hate gate and I smile and let it go! Girl listen to that sing as you exercise and smile and know you look amazing! Have a blessed day! xoxo

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