October 7, 2015

A Calm Life

Sometimes, you know- when I'm scrolling through Facebook and Instagram, I see people, families, lives who are busy.  They have school, swim lessons, work, sports, church, music lessons, homework, gym, etc.  The list goes on.  People are very involved and I started to wonder why we weren't so involved.

At one point, actually earlier this summer, I was extremely jealous of busy people.  I wanted to have
places to be, people to see, things to do.  I was angry that our schedule consisted of waking up.  Why didn't we have more to do?  Was I doing my kids a disservice by not having them involved in more?   Were we ::gasp:: boring!?  What could I do about it?

So I enrolled Kendall in swimming lessons.  I planned numerous camping trips.  We had three out of state trips. There were birthday parties, play dates and there was nothing I said "no" to.  We were BUSY!  There was actually one stretch of time where we were gone, away from home, for six weekends in a row.  And we wondered why our yard always looked like crap...

We had lots of fun, of course.  We made a ton of memories with our kids.  We spent every weekend together as a family.  We tried new things.  Saw new places.  This summer was one for the record books and I'm not sure any summer after is going to ever live up.  This summer was epic.

It was exhausting.  By the time that sixth weekend rolled around I didn't even want to do whatever we had planned.  We were stressed and stretched way too thin.  I just wanted to stay home and BE home.  I wanted to sleep in my own bed.  I actually wanted to do laundry!  I was clearly not designed to be a busy person because once I became one, I didn't like it.  And you know what?  I think being busy made my summer go by even faster and that's something I never want.  I wanted my normal aka "boring" life back.

Then it dawned on me, just because we aren't busy doesn't mean we are boring.  We are living a calm life, and that's okay.  Our kids are still involved and social.  Kendall is currently playing soccer Wednesdays and Saturdays.  James gets to go to story time once a week and toddler time/open gym every Friday.  We go to church every Sunday.  I have bible study every Thursday.  We are still together as a family {most weekends}and we are still, most importantly, having fun!

I don't know why I put so much importance on being busy.  In my mind busy=important.  Busy=fun.  Busy=living life to the fullest.  Everyone around me seems busy so it must be "right".  What a silly way to think.  What a silly way to measure life.

So now we live a calm life and I am 100% a-OK with that.  We have many years ahead of us that are going to be busy all on their own so I am going to enjoy this time where we are moving a little more slowly.  I know the older my kids get the more involved they are going to become.  Who knows?  Maybe one day I will go back to work and then that will bring on it's own "busyness".  But for now we are calm and, most importantly, we are happy.


  1. I tell you what...I was just thinking to myself about how busy we are. It's nuts. Just this month we have literally every single weekend day booked up from weddings to work events to family pictures to little get togethers, and then my work trip is coming up the 23rd....and then Halloween after that. We're literally non stop go go go all this month. And on top of that, of course Chloe has Ballet every Saturday Morning. But I think I would get bored if we had less stuff going on. I like it because it keeps my on my toes. :-)

  2. YES. YES. YES!!!! I could not agree with you more. We have 5 kids and our life is busy. But it's a controlled busy. Last year we cut back big time. Now our kids get to pick one activity to do per season. That's it. We are home for family dinner at least 4 nights out of the week and with the exception of the games of the season we are home on the weekends. We like being at home. I felt like we were a "boring" family too and you know what made me feel that way? Facebook. I had Facebook envy. I logged off of Facebook for 3 months and I feel much better about myself and my family :)

  3. Listen to me -- YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT THING. Busy does not equal important, fun, or living life to the fullest. Trust me. I am the complete opposite ... this Dew family is super busy and wish we were less busy. We are overcommitted right now to the point that every day on the calendar has an activity on it, and I am in the process of dropping things off. Between three kids, homeschooling, graduate school for both Nick and I, plus all the activities we have on our plates, it is too much and exhausting. Trust me, enjoy your time with your family. There is zero reason to sign up for everything under the sun. Enjoy your calm life .. I am working to change things around here to get more calm. There will be plenty of time for busy when your kids are older ... your attitude it perfect and wise.

  4. Girl you are living the life.... just in your own way. I live a busy life because I have a HUGE family and so does my husband. If my side isn't doing something then his side is. Our time flies and, don't get me wrong I love our families, but I absolutely HATE how busy we always are to the point that when I have a weekend of nothing I do just that.... nothing. I sit in my recliner, don't get dressed and soak up doing nothing (and maybe napping). Then by the end of that day I feel bad because I could have done something fun with just our small family instead of recouping from what ever it was we did the night before. I would love a slower life and always say we are going to skip this or that, because I (we) just can't, then in the end we are packing our weekends with a lot of stuff anyway. I feel I am keeping my kids from seeing things like the Zoo, Science Center, you know kid stuff because our weekends are so busy with this gathering, that gathering, birthday party..... I know every life is lived differently but for me I look at your calm life and think.... oh, the things we could just our little family....Enjoy your calm life because from someone with a busy one I see you as living life the way I imagine (envy).

  5. We all have our busy moments and phases and then our quiet down time! Some families love busy and chaos and some love relaxed and chilled... A good balance is for me x