Life After I "Dew"

This week I'm saying SO WHAT if...

• I downloaded a countdown app to keep track of how many days are left till James Weston's arrival.  As if I could possibly forget how many days are left, 14 for those counting.
• A man a the park yesterday asked me "how much longer?" and I SO bad wanted to pretend like I had no idea what he was talking about.
• I have had the same to-do list for months and instead of checking things off of it I find time to-do other things that may or may not be as necessary, like install the infant car seat.
• I saw stray kittens on the deck the other night and kinda, sorta hope that they stick around.  It'd help with our mole & chipmunk problem.
• I hope Kendall never sees said kittens.
• I am having Jimmy get rid of all the plants/flowers in our yard currently.  If it's not a tree or a bush I don't want to see it.  Our yard is way too high maintenance and I already feel better about this decision.  Although, I will miss the flowers, I'm sure.
• I'm loving this fall-like weather.  The windows open in late July is unheard of for Ohio, it's been nice on my pregnant body.
• I promise to stop talking about being pregnant in 2 weeks {or less}.
• I've been stocking up on fall/post-partum clothes for Kendall and I.  
• I sort of have a panic attack every time Kendall mixes the water in with the sand on her new sand & water table.  

Today's post is brought to you by the letter 'P'.  But not really.

***
So Kendall starts preschool in just over a month. I am excited, anxious, nervous {for her}, but most all I'm really really happy.  I know that she is going to thrive in a more structured environment with a schedule and someone else teaching her.  It's especially good that it's happening so soon to her becoming a Big Sister because preschool will be her special thing.  Something she'll have to look forward to {hopefully} and will get her out of the house at least two days a week.  She's so smart and I can't wait to see her grow.

With that being said, what the heck do I send her to school with?  We had to pay an extra $15 with the first month's tuition for school supplies so does that mean I don't need to send her with any?  I kinda started looking forward to stuffing her little Dora backpack full of colored pencils, a notepad and box of tissues but maybe I don't need to do that?  I have no idea.  Also do I just send her in tennis shoes the first day? I have a feeling that play clothes are going to be recommended so I don't think sending her in her cutest sundress and sandals is probably a good idea, right?  Help this preschool newbie mom out!

***
So we are nearing The End with this pregnancy business.  I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, 16 more days {but who's counting?}.  I'm still hoping that I somehow have him before then but at least I know that the longest I have to wait is just over two more weeks.  I cannot wait to see his little face, see what color hair he has {if any}, if he has the Dew little button nose and most of all I cannot wait for my Big Girl to meet her Baby Brother that we've been talking about for roughly 9 months.

The other day Jimmy and I were talking about being pregnant and we both agreed that I am not a pleasant pregnant lady and Jimmy asked if anyone actually liked being pregnant.  I know there are people who love it, I've read their blogs and I am one of them until about 28 weeks at which point I am d-o-n-e.  I shouldn't complain because I have relatively easy pregnancies however the last trimester is torture.  Things ache, body parts that you usually aren't aware of are suddenly screaming with pain, and the anticipation of your new arrival is just enough to send you into a frenzy.

***
Are you experiencing this blast of fall weather like we are in Ohio?  It's glorious, isn't it?  I mean the highs have been in the mid 70s which means our windows are wide open and the fresh air feels amazing.  It's like a pregnant woman's dream come true forecast.  We had a cookout with our friends yesterday and I even wore a jean jacket, it was glorious.  However, I am not ready for summer to be over.  Would you believe that the stores have Oktoberfest out already?  True story.  So the 70s can stay but the winter better not be soon behind because I still have a couple pool days left in my system.

***
Kendall's 3rd birthday party is this weekend.  I cannot believe this is the 3rd party I've planned for her, 3rd!  Crazy business.  This year I'm keeping it simple {hello I'm 100 months pregnant} and letting the fine folks at Chuck-E-Cheese do the dirty work, literally.  I am so happy we went with this decision mainly because it's Kendall's favorite place on Earth but also because of the easy factor.  I just show up 15 minutes prior to party time with cupcakes and they take care of the rest {even favor bags!!!}.  Surprisingly it wasn't that expensive either, I'm pretty sure I spend more between decorations, food, presents, etc throwing a party at home.   And?  I get to leave the mess there?  Win, win.
We've been saying for months that Kendall's Big Sister gift was going to be the Pinky Pie Pony from Build-A-Bear.  Well, wouldn't you know, we went to "build" it this weekend and she's gone.  Discontinued.  #parentfail.  We did get a brochure all about Twilight Sparkle, the newest My Little Pony to join the Build-A-Bear team, so hopefully we can sell her on it before the 14th.  Meanwhile, she's still talking about Pinky Pie...

The other day my friend Cheryl {who is also pregnant with #2} asked me how I was holding up as my days with Kendall, as an only child, are numbered.  She admitted that when she thinks about her only son becoming a big brother it makes her emotional and she cries.  I don't.  I have yet to feel that feeling that everyone talks about.

Am I a bad mom?  Does it mean I don't love my child{ren}?  Am I emotionally unavailable?  Maybe I'm just cold-hearted?

I've been waiting for the day that I feel "it".  The "OMG we are having another baby and my baby won't be my baby anymore and OMG what are we doing!?" feeling.  I've heard my friends tell stories of rocking their first born with their giant, nine-month pregnant belly, and sobbing at the thought of what was about to happen.  I've read countless blog posts that document the final days of only child-ness and the overwhelming feeling of guilt, "will I be able to love another person as much as I love this one?".

Since the day I found out we were expecting Baby Dew #2 I have waited to feel this way.  I can even remember trying to force myself to have these emotions and then thinking, "nope still not there, still not crying" and wondering if maybe I just don't have it in me. Is that weird?

Don't get me wrong, I've had my share of meltdowns but it's usually over the fact that the house is a mess or because Jimmy went hunting {again}.

I think of James Weston joining our family and all I see is love, joy, happiness, our family will be complete.  I know that our love is going to grow and our family is going to be that much better with him in it.  I know that he will know nothing but love, especially from his big sister.  I think about our days and while I know they aren't going to be easy, by any means, I think they will be better.

I also don't really think about things that are too far in the future too much.  I think it's a gift, really.  I don't think about the fact that I'm going to be a mombie {mom-zombie} again because of the sleepless nights.  I don't think about the fact that my nipples are going to be on fire if breast-feeding goes well.  I don't think about the expensive diapers that it seems like we just got rid of.  I would much rather deal with those things when they come because they're inevitable and no amount of worrying about them will change that.  Ignorance is bliss, right?

I've come to realize, I'm not a bad mom and I'm not void of emotion I am just ready for our family to be complete and I know that James Weston is going to do just that upon arrival.  I look forward to the day that my babies will meet each other and Kendall will finally witness the moment we've been talking to her about for the past 9 months.  I think THAT will make me cry.

This week I'm saying SO WHAT if...

• I started tracking my calories again.  I am so beyond ready to get back on the fit train.
• I have Kendall's sand/water table in the living room currently b/c it's too rainy outside.  Call me crazy, go ahead.
• I watch Big Brother After Dark during nap and I may or may not pretend like I'm in the house while it's on.  Obsessed much?
• I do not care, one bit, about the Royal Baby. What about MY baby?
• I'm kind of itching for a new blog design.
• I went and got a pedicure last week, kinda sorta hoping that the rumors of pressure points inducing labor would come true.
• After vacation my child is OBSESSED with Gatorade G2, obsessed.  She calls it her "G", "mommy where's my G?!".  
• I'm dying to see our professional pics that were taken on vacation.  We got a sneak of 9 images and now I'm obsessively stalking the photogs blog for more.
• Even though we have a c-section date scheduled, I really hope I go in labor before then. I am beyond ready to meet this baby.
• I haven't gotten emotional about Kendall no longer being an only child.  Yet.
• I finally got Baby Brother his first monogrammed piece of clothing.  Looks like we're going with James for his name.
• Jimmy and I thought we stumbled across this little yummy hole in the wall {Pies and Pints}when we were in Charleston, only to find out we have one here, at home.  

36 weeks. 23 {maybe less} days left to go.

To say I'm ready and excited to meet this little dude would be an understatement.  I thought I was anxious with Kendall, I am 110 times more anxious this time.  The second time around is no joke, people.

I feel great, for the most part, still.  I'm starting to get "lightening crotch", seriously where did that term come from?  I swear if I walk for any length of time it feels like something is trying to poke it's way out of my body.  I don't know if I remember that with Kendall but WOWZA!  My feet are pretty achy and I have to wear shoes at all times now.  My back is also starting to hurt more these days and so I've been making myself relax, take an Epsom salt bath when I can and it really does help, a lot.

Other than that?  We are just sitting around, anxiously awaiting our newest, fourth family member.  His room is ready, I've started to pack my hospital bag, c-section has been scheduled.  Who knows, I may end up installing the infant seat in the car this week if I get crazy.  Big Sister has been showing signs of readiness too, I think.  She's been playing with her Baby Brother doll a ton and she's been a super mama's girl and I can't help but wonder if it's because she knows her days as an only child are limited?

Remember how I swore I wouldn't gain with James Weston what I gained while pregnant with Kendall?  Well, never say never.  So far I am just two pounds shy of what I weighed the day I had Kendall Paige, almost 3 years ago.  Fail.  But I swear, maybe it's because my hair was shorter when I was pregnant with her, I don't feel as huge.  I much prefer my belly this time around though, it's higher and more round and I feel like it's smaller.  Jimmy was shocked when I told him that I'm pushing my Kendall weight because he feels like I look smaller {better} this time too {thanks, Babe!}.

Even though I've felt good this entire pregnancy {for the most part} I am so over it.  I forgot how miserable the final weeks are.  I am not complaining {yes I am} because it is all totally worth it, obviously, but dudes!  The summer heat and a 30-40 lb weight gain is no joke.  I sweat just standing outside, not even doing anything.  It's making for a very indoor kind of summer which I hate because I love summer, I love the pool, I love laying out, and I love taking Kendall to the park.  All of those things have been done this summer but very minimal and that makes me sad.  I am just ready to start feeling like "me" again.

I've started thinking about post-partum and even indulged in a little retail therapy.  Silly me, once I lost all my weight after Kendall I got rid of all my "fat girl" clothes so thankfully Old Navy had a killer sale last week and I got a few things that will hopefully make me feel better during my transition.  I will be using My Fitness Pal to track my calories again since it worked so well for me the first time.  Dare I say I miss tracking?  I just can't wait to be in control of my body again and feel "normal".

Until then, we wait.

Well boys and girls, Baby Brother's nursery is finally complete.  Actually, it's been complete for about two months now with the exception of the cushion cover for the glider.  Did you know that it's damn near impossible to find a replacement cushion for the Storkcraft glider?  Anyway...it's finished and we are in love with it!
I had posted the inspiration for this room back in March and I'm happy to report that we executed it to a T.  From the colors to the artwork to the furniture.  It is exactly what I had in mind, subtle Star Wars.  And a huge thank you goes out to Kristen and Little Laws Prints, how adorable are those prints above the crib?  She executed my idea perfectly!  And I posted a sneak peek on Instagram and tons of people inquired about the bedding, pretty isn't it?  It's from Beyond Bedding and it was exactly what I had in mind when I started thinking about this room.  Simple, classic, and really affordable.

I said all along that I wanted the focus to be more on the colors, grey, orange, and navy with hints of Star Wars thrown into the mix.  Jimmy knew from the moment we found out we were having a boy that he wanted a Star Wars room and I shuttered at the thought.  But after all is said and done I think it's the perfect mix of his taste and mine.

I am glad that Jimmy is such an avid Star Wars fan because I would have been lost with most of this stuff as I know NOTHING about the movies, characters, books, you name it.  I am clueless, no matter how many times Jimmy tries to get me to watch the series with him.

One of my favorite things about this room is the chalkboard closet doors.  Before they were an awful greenish brown {you can see more here} and they were not going to fly in this room.  The chalkboard paint is a total pain in the a$$.  I mean it's runny, it takes a million coats, it smells, but hot damn if I don't love the results!  I imagine writing him sweet little notes each day on it.

The glider was the finishing touch.  I even emailed the company to get a replacement {it was pink gingham} and they wanted to charge me $107 for a cushion, mind you the entire chair and ottoman cost $135.  Not happening, Storkcraft.  Thank God for a crafty aunt and it's like we have a brand new chair.

Yet another print from Little Laws Prints and a piece of fabric framed and my sweet boys profile.  I love this little corner of the room.  I can just imagine rocking him in there every night and sweet baby snuggles.

The mobile might be Jimmy's favorite part of the room.  I don't really know what any of the things hanging from it are, I ask Jimmy every time, but I do think it looks pretty cool.  That counts for something, right?  I only wish it were a little bit bigger.

This area of the room, nearly killed me.  OK not really but see that frame?  I scored it for a really great deal at Hobby Lobby only to come home and break the glass in it 20 minutes later.  Which resulted in me going back to Hobby Lobby, buying a replacement glass only to have Jimmy break it later that night.  Third times a charm, right?  No.  I bought plexi-glass and there you have it.  Also the mat?  Had to be custom cut.  So my hell of a good deal frame actually ended up costing me upwards of $60.  #decoratingfail  But I do love the print and that little chubby Storm Tropper lamp makes me so happy.

And there you have it folks.  A lot of people commented when I posted my inspiration, telling me how there husbands would LOVE if they would let them do this and I'm here to say, do it!  I wasn't thrilled with the idea when Jimmy first mentioned it but now that it's here and done, I love it!  Whether it's Star Wars or a sports team or even hunting, you can make anything acceptable and cute these days.  That's what Pinterest is for!

This week I'm saying SO WHAT if...

• I have a laundry list of things I need to get done but the things I want to get done always trump them.
• I went on a mini post-partum shopping spree.  Kendall starts preschool less than one month after James Weston will be born and I have to look appropriate.
• I always feel better about online shopping because of my Ebates cash back. It's like I'm always getting a sale!
• We scheduled my c-section but I'm still hoping/praying Baby Brother comes sooner.  These last few weeks are hard.
• I still need to write and mail thank you cards from my sprinkle which was nearly a month ago.
• The nursery has been finished for quite some time now {minus the glider cushion cover} and I've been a total slacker on taking pictures to share.  Perhaps tomorrow.
• We were supposed to conserve energy yesterday between 2-6 and I was definitely doing laundry, cooking dinner and watching TV.
• I am counting down the days till preschool starts.  I think we are both going to benefit from the away time.
• Kendall only wore bathing suits and nightgowns on our vacation.  That is it.
• I am literally doing nothing for Kendall's birthday party this year.  Chuck E Cheese is taking care of everything and I like it that way.  I might make a cake and favor bags, maybe.
• I didn't really miss blogging while I was gone.  I thought I'd come back full of inspiration, ready to write, but nope.  I've got nothing.

This Sunday I hit a pivotal time in pregnancy, 35 weeks with 35 days left until we meet our sweet boy.  I
mean that's huge, right?  I always thought the whole 35/35 thing was really cool.  Anyway...

We had our final ultrasound yesterday, to check things out for scheduling the repeat c-section and I am happy to report that James Weston looks "perfect", their words not mine. He's head down, fluids all look great and he's measuring around 5 lbs 11 oz.  All great news for this mama.  While we didn't get a really good look at his face I am just relieved that he got the green light in terms of development and such.

His birthday is officially scheduled for August 14.

For those of you who are new around here, Kendall's birthday is August 16.  So I hope she wants a baby brother for her 3rd birthday.


I am so happy to have a date in mind.  It makes it so much more real and I can finally start to make plans for this exciting time.  Heck, I'll probably even pack my hospital bag now.  Also, this means we have less than ONE MONTH until we are no longer a family of three but a family of four.  Four.  Wow.

I know there is still a chance he could come sooner, if I go into labor on my own, and let me tell you, I'd welcome that.  I doubt that will happen seeing as though I was induced 9 days late with Kendall and she still didn't want to come out.  I am so ready to be done with this pregnancy it's not even funny.  I remember being, put-a-fork-in-me, done with Kendall but I think this time I'm so much more anxious.  I just cannot wait to get my hands on this little guy and I think the closer we get the more excited Kendall's getting too.

I've mentioned having a repeat/scheduled c-section before and it's raised a few questions.  Do you want to try a VBAC?  It's always risky going in for a major surgery.  Do you worry about recovery?  And while those are all very valid questions and concerns I can honestly say that I feel 100% comfortable and confident in my decision to have another c-section.

Kendall never dropped.  Even once the doctor opened me up he said that normally when you've labored for hours, like I did, the baby is in the canal but she wasn't.  She was right on top of my stomach so a c-section was definitely the best decision.  So far, James Weston has been measuring high too, just like his sister, and while I know a lot can happen in 4-5 weeks but I feel like this is what's best.

The next 4ish weeks are going to be so full of anticipation.  I am so glad we have a lot of events coming up, a  couple of birthday parties, Kendall's 3rd birthday, a wedding, so hopefully time will fly by.  At the same time I feel like we should be soaking up each and every minute we have left as a family of three because before long I won't even know what it's like to have an only child.

James Weston is going to be one lucky boy.  We are all so excited to meet him, see what he looks like and shower him with nothing but love.

We got back from Outer Banks Saturday night after a relatively decent, 12 hour {with 7 stops} car ride home. I'd be lying if I said I felt refreshed, rejuvenated, relaxed or any other adjective to let you think I was feeling good after a week at the beach.  Truth be told?  I am spent.  Here's why...

• Traveling with a toddler.  OK so for the most part she was great.  On our way down we took 2.5 days to get to our destination which meant 3 hours in the car Friday, 6 hours Saturday and then 3 again Sunday.  It was easy on all of us, allowed us to be pretty flexible with our stop times and we really had a lot of fun during those first 3 days.  BUT that's not to say that we didn't hit our fair share of toddler and/or pregnant woman drama.  The pee stops were enough to make Jimmy question his sanity, the amount of Do-Do-Dora from the backseat was epic and the plethora of car snacks were never satisfying.  Needless to say, we were happy to reach our final destination both going and coming home.
• Thirty-five is a lot. As in people.  That's how many went on this vacation and that was only half of Jimmy's family {there are still 3 other aunt/uncle families back in Ohio}.  That means a lot of personalities under one roof, a lot of opinions, a lot of noise, a lot of chaos.  Everyone got along smashing, there was no drama but let's just say we welcomed the quiet when we got home. 
• A car without cruise control does not a fun vacation make.  So remember how I got a new car about a month ago?  Yeah, well,we hate it.  Sure we are saving $100 a month with it but excuse me, no cruise control?  I didn't look for that when we bought it because I'm fairly certain that it's 2013 and that should be standard {my 1999 VW Beetle had it for crying out loud}.  I have hands-free phone but no cruise control?  Suck it Dodge.  I want my Chevy back.
• Sleeping on vacation sucks.  Maybe it's just me or maybe it's the fact that I'm 100 months pregnant but my sleep was less than stellar.  I didn't have enough pillows {4-5} and even though I brought my own body pillow {Jimmy says, "who does that?"} I was always too lazy to go out to the car to get it. I never took a nap and probably should have but I couldn't resist trying to get savage {tan} each day that my child slept blissfully for 3ish hours.  
• My doctor may have been right.  Remember how I said my doctor didn't even want me going on this trip?  Well I disobeyed him and the last day of our vacation I paid for it.  I spent all day Friday {from 3pm till Saturday morning} in bed with a sleeve of saltines, water and Tums.  I've never experienced morning sickness between both of my pregnancies but if what I was feeling that day/night is any comparison I truly feel for those that do.  OMG that was the worst.  I just kept thinking to myself, "you cannot throw up because if you do you can start contractions and you CANNOT have this baby in North Carolina!"  So I held it down but here we are, 3 days later, and I still feel queasy.  Dr Russ-1 Shannon- 0.
• A house cleaner didn't come while we were gone.  I cleaned pretty good before we left and made the beds and had the house in a nice "Welcome Home" state but now I have no less than 5 loads of laundry to wash and put away, a broken dishwasher, an empty fridge that needs stocked ASAP, thank you cards to send from my sprinkle, Kendall's birthday invites to mail, and peace tees to start mailing.  It's enough to make my head spin and yet here I am at 6 am writing a blog post.  I'm fairly certain I'll need a sitter this week to get any of these things accomplished.  Or a house cleaner.
• Jimmy's family is amazing.  This is our 3rd trip like this one and each time I am always so blessed and appreciative of how welcoming and loving they all are.  The first year I went I was nervous of being the newbie and even then I never once felt like I didn't belong.  At times I think that I might even be closer with them than my own family, all 35 of them.  

This week I'm saying SO WHAT if...

• My baby sprinkle gift cards were burning a hole in my pocket and half of them are already spent.
• I'm excited for vacation, I love the beach, but I think I'm most excited about disconnecting for a solid week.
• I've accepted the fact that this house will never be as clean for Baby Brother's arrival as it was for Kendall's.
• I kinda feel like the whole Google Reader thing was blown way out of proportion.
• I've already got my favorites on Big Brother and one of them may or may not be Elissa.
• I still don't get why some bloggers are "popular".
• My family and I have a running group FB message and it's making me even more excited to spend a week with these crazy people. 
• I bought two new hospital outfits for myself and I'm just packing them straight into my bag.  I can't wait to have brand new, never worn clothes this time around.  I'm hoping it'll help make me feel normal/less disgusting.
• I decided at the last minute that I needed a fresh cut & color before we leave on Friday.  Thankfully I have a wonderful stylist and she got me in bright and early yesterday!
• I'm not going to have guest posts while I'm away.
• I suck at laundry.  I'm pretty good at all other household chores, I think.

OK so I have to admit that my morning routine is a bit daunting each and every day.  I hate the thought of getting up and getting ready--it just seems a little pointless to get wet just to get dry again.  Why can't I just roll out of bed looking like a million bucks?  No matter how many anti-aging creams I use I still look like a hot mess.  From the shower to drying off to the hair, makeup, lotions, etc. it's all so tedious and on some days I don't do any of it.  There, I said it.  My poor husband.  Sometimes Always I want to trade places with my husband who just showers and gets dressed looking so naturally adorable and knows that whatever outfit he puts on will fit.  Men, they have it so easy. 

Since becoming a mom I've managed to keep my whole morning routine to under an hour--to me that is good.  I've toyed with showering at night but that leaves my hair too blah in the morning.  I've tried showering my body at night and washing my hair in the sink in the morning and that works unless the sink is full of dirty dishes.  Not that that happens ever, we always do our dishes right away. I'm always looking for ways to cut corners because getting dressed with an antsy toddler is hard enough and soon I'm going to have a needy newborn thrown into the mix. I hate to say it but I NEVER use body lotion.  Ever. Well, I do on my face (gotta prevent those wrinkles) but my body?  Forgettaboutit.  I don't even use the stretch mark creams because, dude, that stuff is thick and takes FOREVER to "dry" and don't get me started on the smell.  The only time I use lotion is if I use my sunless tanners and even those have fallen by the wayside these days.  It's just one.more.thing on the list and ain't nobody got time for that stuff to dry before getting dressed. I hate that I don't have the soft, touchable, womanly skin that everyone loves and it's all because of my laziness.  

When I heard about Vaseline® Spray & Go Moisturizer Total Moisture® it was like I heard angels singing.  Although, I have to admit, at first I thought it was a tinted moisturizer #blondemoment.  But this stuff is the bees knees. Hear me out. Vaseline Spray & Go Moisturizer Total Moisture is a continuous spray moisturizer that absorbs almost instantly making it easy to get dressed right away.  It's not greasy--trust, I would be the first to report if it were because nothing is worse than feeling like a piece of fried chicken.  It's so easy to use that you can even get the hard to reach places that would normally require the help of another person.  Even better is there is no stinky smell.   Needless to say this stuff totally helps with the hustle and bustle of the morning routine and ensures that you get your daily moisturizing in too.  Now, maybe they'll come out with a tinted version (hint hint, wink wink). 

To find out more, check out their Facebook page. How would Vaseline Spray & Go Moisturizer Total Moisture max your morning?  Leave an answer in the comments below and each entry will automatically be entered for a chance to win a $1,000 SpaFinder gift card. Entries will be pooled from participating blogs and one winner chosen.

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